lifestyle

"I visited The Lindo Wing. And it's not somewhere you want to leave in a hurry."

The Lindo Wing at St Mary’s Hospital in Paddington, London, is a place of birthing perfection.

It was the green tea at The Lindo Wing that got me. As I reached out and gripped the warm cup of green goodness every inch of stabbing pain disappeared.

The thick, blizzard like snow falling down around me was practically invisible, oh yes – the sun was shining bright in my world. I’d just given birth to my first baby boy, Leo, at St Mary’s Hospital in Paddington, after a 48-hour labour – in the midst of one of London’s worst snow storms.

Read our full royal coverage here: The wait is over – The second royal baby is here.

My little darling was quite the beast. He was 10 days late and twice induced. To say he wouldn’t come out is an understatement: he couldn’t come out: this little cherub weighed in at a whopping 10-pound 8 baby (5ks) and was delivered by emergency- c-section after what felt like an epic battle in the bowels of the World War 2 style delivery suite. 

My only real memory after labouring for that long was the blue paint peeling from the walls.. the blood curdling screams of labouring women..and over worked nurses running from bed to bed.

So I felt rather smug when I busted out of the over-crowded, understaffed public ward just 8-hours post c-section to try my luck at The Lindo Wing. That magical place where PRINCESSES and PRINCES are born.

Yes! That’s where I was going. And no-one was going to stop me.

Not even the scowling registrar signing my release forms.

I was off to the ROYAL ward. London would have to freeze over before I stayed public any longer. Not when the royal ward was free, thanks to my health insurance.

My mother bumped and dragged my wheelchair over the old London cobbles, excruciating pain piercing my middle. My husband hurried to clear the paperwork that would allow us into that magical place where unicorns roam and elephants fly… where they offer you green tea at their heavenly gates.

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It’s okay: Most women do not look like Kate when they’ve just had a baby.

Why oh why why why then, would the Duchess of Cambridge decided to check out so early? She stayed just a few hours before getting a quick blow-dry, putting on a nice frock and bolting back to Kensington Palace.

After I gave birth, all I could think about was getting in.

It’s soooooo dreamy in there. Light filled and quiet…. nursing staff who feel like your favourite old Aunty with their outstretched arms and kind, warm, encouraging faces. Faces that say – you can do this, new Mama. You’ll be OK. Because you’re here with us. In The Lindo Wing. Nothing ever goes wrong at The Lindo Wing.

With staff that pamper and primp, an a la carte menu, proper coffee (hard to find in London) delicious snacks on hand whenever you want, ensuites, fluffy white towels, scrumptious body products.. thick white slippers.. a reclining feeding chair.. TV.. room service, nurses on call and white coated specialist after specialist fussing over you and your baby.

Why Kate, why? Why not stay and hide from the demands of public life?

Sadly for me, my stay at The Lindo Wing was short lived. They were fully booked and couldn’t take me. I transferred to The Portland Private Hospital for Women and Children, which was equally as amazing and hotel like.

I may have had a traumatic birth, but I got a sneak peak at how the other side live, and for that, I’ll always be thankful for my little 10pound prince.

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