Carla GS celebrating her love for Impulse body sprays. (Source: Supplied.)
To my dear, beloved Impulse body mist,
You are my first fragrance love, and nothing will ever change that. Not the designer fragrances, or the clinical strength antiperspirant deodorants. My heart will always belong to Impulse body spray.
Others may sneer that you are nothing but a cheap spray, disguised as a perfume. To that, I say, NO! You are a “body mist”. It’s different. And I love your simplicity, your no-nonsense girly scents.
There are times when I feel a bit stinky, but don’t want to commit to re-applying an antiperspirant. And so it is you, Impulse, who makes me feel prettily scented all over again. (Post continues after gallery.)
At other times, I may want to add some romantic allure to my being, but don’t want to “waste” a spritz of my expensive French designer fragrance. Impulse, it is you who saves the day. “Wow, you smell nice,” many a person has told me after I have merely applied my supermarket-purchased Impulse.
Oh, Impulse, I adore how you add charm and sweetness to situations that would otherwise… reek. You have come to my rescue when I’m trying to sleep at night, only to have my husband fart up a foul storm after we spent the night munching on salami pizzas.
I confess that I have slept with you by my side, for those exact moments. When the fartmosphere gets too much, a quick, tiny spray of my trusty Impulse and the problem is solved. I can drift off into fragrant dreams, and it’s all thanks to you, Impulse.
But it’s not just your convenience, your air-freshening powers, or even your smell that appeals to me. No, Impulse, I first desired you as a status symbol.
I know it’s been 20 years since we first met. Two decades since I first caught a whiff of your girly scent in my high school’s gym change room. All of my friends carried a tube of you around in their backpacks and would take you out during Year 8 English and then spray you all over their uniformed bodies with a dramatic swoop of the arm.
You were the ultimate status symbol, because to own you would say one thing: I am a woman and I smell divine.
Back then, in 1995, you were the colourful, metallic tube that was the object of my desire. I even daydreamed that I would get a gift pack of all of the Impulse body sprays for Christmas. Even your names were intriguing and appealing: “Illusions” was a particular favourite. These days, I feel that “Goddess” not only describes me, but also creates a gorgeously pear-like scent.