Ask Bossy: "My bridesmaid ruined my hens night. Should I dump her?"

Hi darlings,

This week’s Ask Bossy dilemma comes from a bride-to-be. It was marked URGENT! Because with a wedding on the way…someone is a little worried.

It all happened at the hens’ party…

Dear Bossy,

I’m getting married in the next few weeks and recently had my hen’s party. During the course of the weekend, one of my closest friend’s proceeded to suck face and become kind of a hot mess in all of the most inappropriate ways on the dance floor, and I suspect the bathroom with a young punk..

This wouldn’t be a problem except that she’s married.

It put me in a bit of an awkward spot to have to explain to my other friends why a) why my bestie and bridesmaid was cheating on her new-ish husband and b) to be honest, it just made look at her differently.

It put a real dampener on the night and I wound up drunk crying.  Now it’s the thing I’ll remember about the weekend as opposed to the amazing and beautiful party my gf’s threw for me! I hate confrontation so chose not to address it the next day when the hangovers had set in.

I truly feel weirded out about the whole situation and now don’t know if I really want her standing up beside me as I take my vows. Which sucks because before now, she’s been a great pal.

Am I just being a judgmental friend and should mind my own bees wax or am I right in feeling icky about it?


Judgemental bride-to-be.

 OK, I’m not holding back this week.

Here’s the thing you need to know, bride-to-be. As much as you think your hens weekend is about you, it’s not.

You gotta get over this idea that you can control the world. It’s a big mysterious beast. You can’t control life. And you can’t control your best friend. She went and did something a little bit stupid during your hens night. But you need to pull it back from being about you.

People do stuff all the time that’s immoral and wrong. And if it’s your friend, you should be able to forgive them.

Like Mia Freedman says, this will be the least of your worries – sh*t’s going to happen on your wedding day too. And that’s okay, they’re the weddings you remember.  If something something doesn’t go wrong at a wedding, it’s boring.

Wedding crashers or wedding crushers? KDB and Mia 

So Judgemental bride-to-be, pop a chill pill and ride the wave.

(Also, congratulations, have a lovely, if not perfect day).

Got a life dilemma you need help with? email or dial up the pod phone: 02 8999 9386

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