Jessica and Rohan lost their precious baby girl, Scout Sunflower Macpherson, on the 13th of May. Now, they’re planning their wedding. In this beautiful post, Jessica writes about how happiness and grief can sit side by side.
Content warning: this post deals with stillbirth and may be distressing for some readers.
On May the 12th, something happened that would change at least two lives forever. I was 35 weeks and 4 days pregnant, my partner Rohan and I were going about our day as we normally would.
We had been at school, teaching our students, I had been getting ready to start maternity leave, we had been preparing to turn our family into a team of three.
At 4pm, I went to the doctor’s, expecting to be told to stop training at the gym, to begin to wind down, to get ready to bring our newborn home. Life had other plans, and instead of being an average appointment, it turned into our worst nightmare. Our doctor could not find our precious baby’s heartbeat.
Over the next couple of hours we would hear the torturous words that no parent ever wants to hear: “I’m sorry, there’s no heartbeat.” On the 13th May, the very next day, our beautiful baby girl, Scout Sunflower Macpherson, was stillborn, she was perfect in every way, a head full of black hair, a cute button nose, she had ten fingers and ten toes.