real life

Group Therapy: "My marriage is perfect, except for the sex."

Marriage = good. Sex = bad.

From the outside, I have a seemingly perfect life.

A handsome, faithful, hard working and kind husband who is wonderful with our two children, who are both under five.

He doesn’t go straight to the pub after work, nor does he gamble. Three days per week he picks the kids up from school, feeds them, bathes them, does homework and gets them into bed at a decent hour while I work.

We have a lovely house, good jobs and a wonderful network of friends and family.  There is not much about my husband or my life which I could complain about.


In the last year or so, I have grown to be almost repulsed by my husband’s kisses. We were never really compatible in that area from the beginning, but I ignored it – mostly because I was crazy about him.

Lately, however, it has become a big irritation to me and I find myself cranky in general because of it. We are still intimate, but it’s become a chore on my part and of course, there is very little kissing.

Because of my lack of enthusiasm I suppose, he is also less enthused… and that leads to? Bad sex.

I really have grown apart from him over the last year. I realise we have so little in common, so little to talk about and I guess I am quite lonely in my marriage.

I guess my question is… do I give up 80% of near perfection for 20% of far from perfection? Is bad sex really a reason to end a relationship?

The author of this post is a Mamamia reader who wishes to remain anonymous.

Do you have any advice for our author? How important is good sex within marriage?