"Help. I've become addicted to the one TV show I swore I would never, ever watch."

A few weeks ago I found myself in a bit of a television pickle.

Game of Thrones was ending, I’d devoured every available episode of Younger and my days watching The Handmaid’s Tale already felt like a distant memory.

So there I was, with Netflix open on my laptop and absolutely nothing to watch.

It’s not that there was a lack of options. I could have very well started true crime doco series The Confession Tapes. I could have satisfied my cravings for drama and love by trying out Outlander.

But instead, in what I now consider my darkest TV hour, I turned to the one show I’d been slamming for years. The one show I promised myself I would never, ever watch.

Grey’s Anatomy.

Meredith Grey Grey's Anatomy
I find this image to be incredibly triggering. Image via ABC.

I hit 'play' in a moment of weakness. And 166 episodes (that's more than five days straight worth of watching) in, I am absolutely hooked.

I can't pinpoint just one reason why I've resisted the TV juggernaut for so long. It's arguably one of the most successful and well-known dramas in current existence (yes, this is a friendly reminder that the show's 14th season is just about to premiere), but I've never really been interested.

Love TV? Listen to the latest episode of Mamamia's television podcast, The Binge: (Post continues after audio...)

Perhaps it's because the show's most memorable moments are so highly publicised that I already knew the fate of almost every character before I even started the very first episode. (Spoilers below...)

Derek 'McDreamy' Shepherd dies, Izzie Stevens gets cancer and runs away, and George O'Malley is so horribly disfigured after being hit by a bus that it's too late by the time his former colleagues figure out who he is.

There only one guarantee when it comes to Grey's Anatomy: there will never, ever be a happy ending.

greys anatomy characters
Almost every character you know and love will disappear. Image via ABC.

The more I watch, the more dramatic the deaths - and the scenarios the characters face - get.

The other day I watched an episode where a lion - a LITERAL LION - wrecked havoc on Seattle and put a number of patients in the E.R..

Then there were the episodes where Izzie had very loud, very passionate sex with the ghost of her dead, heart transplant patient fiancé. Really.

I even battled against every single urge I had to hit 'skip' when the eighteenth episode of the show's seventh season decided to become an all-singing, all-dancing musical event.

(It was tough and I may have needed more than one glass of wine to get through it, I'll admit.)


But somehow, I keep battling through. I keep watching, telling myself every night at 1am that 'this is the last episode' I'll watch tonight, only to find myself three hours later looking like a living, breathing version of this meme:

Self portrait.

(This coming from a person who once sat through all seven seasons of Dance Moms. I very clearly have a problem.)

Perhaps it's because the thing I hate the most about Grey's Anatomy is the fact that I don't really hate it at at all.

If you're looking for a show that's damn entertaining, and requires little to no brain energy to figure out what's going on, it's the show for you.

And that's exactly what I was looking for when I ran out of other, more intelligent, more 'trendy' things to watch.

It's also a show that has been praised for itss racially diverse cast, portrayal of same-sex relationships and discussion of topics that are too often ignored on mainstream television: abortion, mental health and domestic violence.

The show is also female-led and female-focussed, with many characters weighing up the question many women face: do I choose work, or do I choose family? And what happens if I try to choose both?

So as far as late night, desperately-seeking-something-to-watch choices, I could do a lot worse than Grey's Anatomy.

Like The Big Bang Theory perhaps...

The award-winning podcast Mamamia Out Loud is doing their first live show. There will be laughs, disagreements and you can meet the hosts afterwards! We’re also donating $5 of every ticket price to Share The Dignity so grab your friends and come along to share the love and laughs, get your tickets here.