I just finished reading the wonderful news about Sonia Kruger’s pregnancy. Even though I don’t know Sonia personally, I am truly thrilled for her and am so proud of her for being honest about the reality of her conception.
I too conceived my daughter through a long IVF tour of duty and also needed the help of an egg donor. (In summary, six years, 11 rounds of IVF and two egg donors). I gave birth to our gorgeous girl at 42, and I am planning on trying for number two next March with our remaining embryo. I will be close to 45 if the second pregnancy is successful.
Too many times these days the headlines read of celebs having babies in their 40s. I think it has almost become kind-a hip and cool to say you had your successful career and now you’ve managed to squeeze in a baby before it’s too late. But whenever I see this, all I think (and say to anyone who will listen), there is no way that baby was conceived naturally and it most likely came from a donor egg.
At 35, my marriage of seven years was heading downhill. In an attempt to make things work, we moved to my home country to be closer to my family. Somehow we made it through those bad times and decided to try for the family we had always dreamed of. I was merrily going along my baby making plan until I ran into a pregnant work colleague in the tearoom one day and we started talking baby. She confessed she had been trying for years, IVF – the works. She was in her early 40s. She asked me how old I was and how long I had been trying. I was 36, and had been trying for 12 months. I was ordered to get myself off to a fertility specialist, pronto!
What? I thought. Is she for real? And sure enough, my specialist explained this might be the only option for me. IVF is not as straightforward as you may think. It’s like any major undertaking. There is a lot of background work before you get started. Blood tests, internal ultrasounds, laparoscopies, D&Cs, even police checks. For me, it was discovered I needed my gall bladder removed before I could start any treatment and that set us back another few months. When your fertility clock is ticking, with every delay those ticks get louder and louder!
After nine rounds of IVF using my own eggs and one pregnancy fail on round four, my doctor was completely honest with me. There wasn’t much chance of me conceiving with my eggs, even though I have tons of them. We had given the last four years a good go. It was time to move on and consider an egg donor.