Is losing your birthday sparkle just part of being in your 30s?

iVillage writer, Avi, has lost her birthday sparkle and she is worried she won’t get it back.

On Sunday, I will be celebrating my 21st birthday for the 10th time (for those without a calculator, that is 31).

And…well…I have found myself…just not that excited about it.

You might be thinking So?. But it is a big problem. You see, I am a lover of my birthday. In fact, I tend to dedicate the entire week to be about birthday celebrations. I technically consider the entire month of May as “my month”. I get excited about organising dinners with family members and friends.

But this year. Not so. And I don’t know what is happening. I feel like I have lost my birthday sparkle.

My husband asked me what I wanted for my birthday last week. I love birthday presents. Birthday presents are the kind of presents that you get because you want them. Not need them. And I usually have a list going in my head at the beginning of April. This year. Blah. No excitement.

This is what I feel like doing when someone mentions my birthday.

He then asked me what I wanted to do to celebrate. Again. Nothing. Yes, I have organised dinner with friends on Saturday night but I am not as excited about celebrating my birthday with friends as I usually am. I'm usually planning my outfit in my head on the bus to work. Nadda.

In my family, we celebrate birthdays by going to a restaurant of the birthday girl/boy's choosing. I'm usually looking up restaurants and drooling over menus 2 weeks before the big day. Nadda.


I love having multiple birthday celebrations. Friends, couple time with the husband, my family, his family... This year, I just want everyone in one place so I can get it over with.

My husband also asked me what I wanted to do on my birthday day. Sundays are usually reserved for buying groceries and cleaning the house. These two activities are on my most fun things to do list with pap smears and blood tests. But I honestly don't have any will to do anything else.

Is this what normally happens? At some age you just stop caring about your birthday. That my birthday sparkle is gone forever? And I will never be able to recover it. Is 31 the age birthday sparkle dies?

When Lisa Simpson had a case of the birthday blues, Bart and a fake Michael Jackson came to her rescue: “Lisa it’s your birthday, Happy Birthday Lisa.”

And it isn't like I have anything to complain about in life. I am not unhappy about celebrating my 21st birthday for the 10th time.

I am probably happier in my life than I have ever been. There isn't anything wrong with my world to dim my birthday sparkle.

It is just gone.

So iVillagers, I am asking you. As we get older, do we just get less and less excited about our birthdays? Was last year my final year of birthday sparkle and I didn't even know it?

And while I am at it...does this happen to Christmas too? Because then I might just cry.

Is it inevitable that we lose our birthday sparkle? And most importantly, how can you get it back?