rogue

According to Gen Z, here are the 6 things that make you... deeply uncool.

There comes a time in every adult's life when you realise you're no longer... cool.

You can't relate to the youth of the day anymore and you're mocked by the way you part your hair.

As a millennial hurling towards 30 much quicker than I'd like, this realisation was just one more thing I didn't need, ya know?

DRIVE FASTER PLS.  

Over the last wee while, I've heard murmurings on the internet but also from my much-younger colleagues who I think were hired to make the rest of us aware of our mortality.

ADVERTISEMENT

Watch: What millennials are afraid of. You can now add Zoomers to this list. Post continues below video.


Video via Mamamia.

These murmurs have been disturbing. And worst of all, personal.

Because skinny jeans are no longer ~in fashion~ and what the HELL IS GOING ON I EXCLUSIVELY OWN SKINNY JEANS?

I hate it here.

ADVERTISEMENT

As outlined below, Gen Z have declared many things millennials hold near and dear deeply uncool, so prepare to feel... personally attacked.

However, it does help to remember these kids are the same ones who ate tide pods. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Anyway. If you spot a bunch of youths sniggering in your direction, or someone with absolutely no creases around their eyes randomly tells you to go read Harry Potter... this is why:

Uncool factor 1: Wearing your hair in a side part.

If you went through an emo phase, this will hurt extra bad.

NO. Image: Giphy. 

The unofficial millennial haircut involves parting your hair deep to the side, but Zoomers hate it. I don't want to know what they'd say about 2007-2008's side fringe moment.

Throw out your retinol because apparently all we need to look part of the younger generation is a middle part.

ADVERTISEMENT

Uncool factor 2: Using cry laugh emojis.

Here are my most frequently used emojis:

The hand-over-mouth, shade and tea emojis are especially... exposing. Image: Getty. 

What this doesn't show is how I would need to use the sobbing emoji approximately 12,000 times more before it overtook the cry laughing face as number one.

Plus, THERE ARE TWO CRY LAUGH EMOJIS AND BOTH ARE IN MY TOP FIVE.

ADVERTISEMENT

I don't think I'm alone in this, but if I don't want to expose myself as LAME and OLD to youths, I'm doing a terrible job.

Supposedly Gen Z'ers use the skull emoji to show laughter. This is... interesting, because my use of the skull emoji (as indicated above) was about a dead cockroach in my apartment.

Oh god... I am so old.

Uncool factor 3: Wearing skinny jeans.

I remember being 13 years old and experiencing the mid 2000s shift from low-cut flared jeans to high-waisted skinny jeans in real time. 

IT WAS A TOUGH TIME. Image: Getty.

WE PROGRESSED. 

WE MOVED FORWARD.

SO WHY ARE WE NOW GOING BACKWARDS?

According to the Gen Z'ers of TikTok, skinny jeans are OUT and we need to swap them out for baggier styles immediately or risk looking ✨lame as hell✨.

(Am I using those sparkle emojis right???)

@julia3lle

i will never wear skinny jeans and i live by that #foryoupage

♬ original sound - audios

Uncool factor 4: Our... lingo.

If you complain about 'adulting', declare 'I did a thing' after every small task and/or major achievement, and point out 'doggos' at the park... just know, Gen Z are laughing at you.

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Uncool factor 5: Our reliance on coffee but also wine.

Gen Z make fun of millennials for using coffee and wine as a coping mechanism, which is going to be hilarious when they hit mid 20s and realise they need coping mechanisms too.

JUST YOU WAIT. LIFE HITS YOU LIKE A TRUCK.

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Uncool factor 6: Knowing... and caring about your Hogwarts house.

Nothing really impacted millennial childhoods and pop culture like Harry Potter did and I'm sorry but you can't just forget that sort of passion.

Unfortunately for us, this passion has now turned into a point of ridicule, with Gen Z telling millennials liking Harry Potter is not a personality trait.

ADVERTISEMENT

Image: Giphy.

I mean... ouch.

Thankfully, I'm a Ravenclaw and happy to go against the grain. 

Suck it, kidlets.

Feature image: Getty/Twitter.