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Game of Thrones recap: There's more to Jon and Daenerys than you think.

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Game of Thrones has gone rogue and I have absolutely no complaints.

Maybe the storyline got a little shaky there (you’re srsly going to catch a white walker just to prove to Cersei that they exist. That seems… extreme).

Maybe everyone semi-forgot about the construct of time/geography/the logistics of travel (that’s fine [that’s absolutely not fine]).

Maybe there were one too many fan theories about Bran being the Night King and Cersei not really being pregnant that pushed me over the edge and made me question whether everything I’ve ever known was really a lie.

WHO IS WHO AND WHERE AM I BUT ALSO WHY.

But now we have a goddamn WHITE WALKER ZOMBIE ICE BREATHING NIGHT-KING-CARRYING DRAGON and nothing will ever be the same again.

There are three things we need to talk about that just went down in Beyond the Wall. 

Arya is threatening Sansa... with her faces.

For almost two seasons, all I've been able to deduce from Arya's plot line is that it has something to do with ~the faces~. Now, she's being weird and carrying them in a handbag to scare her big sister with, which is rude.

Arya and Sansa have a big fight about the fact that Sansa almost married Joffrey (ew) and swore allegiance to the Lannisters (awks), dismissing her father as a traitor. Arya's all like, 'why didn't you save our dad?' and Sansa's like, 'wait, why didn't you?' and no one could have bloody saved Ned Stark because that is the nature of violence/power/Game of Thrones. 

Listen: The Binge deep dives into this week's epic episode of Game of Thrones. Post continues after audio. 

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Later, Sansa walks into a room and finds Arya's bag of faces, which we didn't know was a thing (a handbag seems slightly... casual? For your faces?) and as Sansa's trying to work out what's going on with her sister's new mask hobby, Arya quietly appears behind her.

She starts rattling off stories about faces and taking her sister's face and she's holding a knife and it's all very... disturbing.

But more importantly, Sansa is then mean to goddamn Brienne which is NOT ON. I shan't stand for it.

It's important I take out my anger on the one person who always has my best interests at heart, Brienne.

Sansa, pls. How dare you be perfectly polite to Littlefinger and then send Brienne off ON HER OWN to King's Landing. YOU DIDN'T EVEN LET HER LEAVE PODRICK TO PROTECT YOU. YOU KNOW HOW BRIENNE FEELS ABOUT DOING HER PROTECTING.

SHE EVEN MADE A POINT OF SAYING PODRICK IS NOW A 'COMPETENT SWORDSMAN' WHICH I THINK WE CAN ALL AGREE WERE THE TWO MOST VITAL WORDS OF DIALOGUE IN THIS ENTIRE SEASON.

Jon Snow's ill-conceived plan ends... badly.

Nothing about this expedition was ever going to end well, but it starts off with a lot of wind, snow and unexpectedly good banter (amirite?!).

The group captures a white walker, which is good, but then they get surrounded by the entire army of white walkers, which is bad. For a while, holes in the ice keep the army at bay, but then the white walkers start coming at a convenient pace so approximately six men can still fight them comfortably.

Just when things are getting too stressful, goddamn Daenerys arrives with her dragons to save them all.

But then... it happens.

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It's... it's one of the dragons. Yes, I could go and Google the name of the specific dragon that died, but let's be honest - it's Drogon's brother.

The Night King launches an icy arrow/javelin stick thing at the dragon and it strikes him, leaving him to squeal and fall to the ice. It's so sad. Drogon is crying, and Daenerys is devastated that Drogon lost his brother. He really liked that brother.

#noregrets

While Jon is still fighting some white walkers underwater, the other men climb on top of Drogon and Daenerys is forced to leave him behind.

We're 87.68 per cent sure this will be Jon's end, but then BOOM some guy who I can't remember comes out of nowhere, gives Jon his horse, and then gets eaten alive by zombies.

I'm told this man is named is Benjen and he's Ned Stark's younger brother. He seems nice.¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Something is brewing between Daenerys and Jon and there IS SO MUCH FORESHADOWING I THINK I'M BACK IN YEAR 12 ENGLISH.

I've been advocating for a Daenerys and Jon Snow love affair since I was in the womb and if one more person tells me they're related... I swear to god.

I don't care. This show has dragons and zombies and Bran Stark - a little bit of incest should be no one's biggest concern.

If you were watching Beyond the Wall closely, you would've picked up countless clues when it comes to Jon and Daenerys' future together.

First, there's the weirdly-chummy conversation between Tyrion and Daenerys where he suggests Jon loves her, and she gets all shy.

Dany, pls.
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But then, there's the several overt references to how she can't have children. She says it to Tyrion, and she later says it to Jon, when they're in the midst of an intense hand-holding session. She explains that her dragons are her children, and they're the only children she'll ever have.

Contrast these comments with the moment Jorah gives his blessing for Jon to keep his father's sword, and tells him, "may it serve you well, and your children after you".

WHY ALL THE TALK OF CHILDREN?

In the books, there's some intense symbolism about Dany, Jon and a blue rose that has something to do with fertility. A lot of people have interpreted the book to suggest that together, the pair can bare a child.

Having lost one of her children (Drogon's brother), Daenerys might be destined to have a human child with Jon Snow, whose sperm, yes, has been resurrected, but we're sure is very nice.

BUT.

Even though we saw Jon 'bend the knee' to Daenerys, we discovered last week that Jon actually has a more legitimate claim to the throne than Daenerys does. Will they have a baby and then be ripped apart by a fight for power?

If Year 12 English taught me anything, it's that something is going to happen with Jon, Daenerys and children. Yes pls.

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