In my 34 years on this earth I’ve had a lot of friends.
Some have been life-long friendships, some have been “friendship flings”, and others have resulted in the kind of dramatic breakups you’d expect from romantic relationships.
Friendships can be tricky, but they can also be an absolute lifeline and one of the most important parts of your life.
You do need to be a little wary of who you invite into your life though – bad friendships can be toxic and they can end up being a huge waste of your time and energy.
Here are seven friendship red flags you need to look out for:
1. The friend who wants to become your best friend way too quickly.
I’d like to take this opportunity to remind you about little film called Single White Female.
The movie is about a woman named Hedra who becomes obsessed with her new housemate, Allison (Bridget Fonda) – to the point that she starts to dress and act just like her. Then right at the end of the movie she tries to kill her with the heel of her stiletto.
The Mamamia Out Loud team discuss how to cut loose your ‘obligatory friend’ (and how to tell if you ARE the obligatory friend). Post continues…
There were many red flags before she got to that point, but Allison didn’t see them or chose to shrug them off.
Of course, I’m not suggesting that every new friend who comes into your life is trying to kill you with footwear – but not all of them have the best of intentions.
If you find yourself the target of a friend who is coming on a little too strong, it’s best to establish clear boundaries straight away… and to also hid any sharp objects.
2. The friend who ignores your successes but revels in your failures.
I call this one the partly-cloudy friend.
In a sentence – she’s overcast with a 90% chance of being a complete cow.
She’s that friend who’s always around, seemingly supportive and interested in your life, but she has an ulterior motive – you’re a prop in her efforts to feel better about herself. Your failures are her successes.
She’ll love you when things aren’t going well for you and ignore you as soon as things turn around.