By Veronica, a guest author on DivorcedMoms.com.
Between my research, my hives, extremely tight support garments and coordinating a babysitter for my little rendezvous I forgot to have fun and enjoy my first date after divorce.
After my divorce, I vowed to give myself at least a three-year “healing” period before even considering a date of any sort. Armed with my self-help books and post-divorce dating and advisory blogs, I was spending my nights mostly working through my 1000 stages of grief and working on making myself whole again (however bad that sounds).
Dating took me by surprise as I did not find him online or in the personals section, he literally ran into me (with his shopping cart) in my local grocer. After he apologised for the injuries I sustained and bribed me with hot pancakes (writing his name and number on the serviette in the packet), we started chatting via our mobiles for a few days. Then he asked me out. Something I was not mentally or physically prepared for but agreed to in less than a split second.
When you knew it was time for a divorce. Post continues below.
As the day of our date approached, however, I broke out in hives due to a long overdue “wax-on/wax-off” job on my legs going horribly wrong. My next stumbling block was getting into my spandex support garment (one of those shape and firm jobs that can lead to restricted breathing and intense sweating). Ugh!
I googled topics to discuss on the date and topics to avoid, gestures that could be seen as flirtatious and gestures that would indicate interest, how to greet your date on arrival and how to say goodbye on departure (based on three possible scenarios of course: I.e. the date went well and you want to see him again, the date went badly and you never ever want to even speak to this human again, the date went well but can only lead to a deep friendship).
Needless to say between my research, my hives, extremely tight support garments and coordinating a babysitter for my little rendezvous I forgot to have fun and enjoy the process. The evening arrived and it all went swimmingly well, no chemistry though but he remains a good friend until today.