“Ugh”.
That’s the only word that could even begin to describe how Shelly Mettling was feeling after suffering a miscarriage just two weeks after finding out she was pregnant.
“Two weeks ago we found out we were growing our family to three… we were excited, nervous and extremely grateful,” the 28 year-old wrote on Instagram last week.
“Today is a bit different…as We lay here losing something we prayed so damn hard for I can’t help but be angry, emotional, sad, confused and frustrated!”
But despite the devastating experience, Mettling wrote there was one feeling from the happy period she would be holding on to – being “grateful”.
“I’m grateful that I got to feel (even for a short time) the power of motherhood. I’m grateful that I got to experience the bond that a woman feels the instant she finds out she is growing a little human in her belly. I’m grateful I got to feel the love I was capable of feeling/giving to someone that I had never even met!,” she wrote.
“I’m grateful for the Fact that God Gave me this Experience to test my strength. I’m grateful for the family and friends that have been checking in on me and lifting me up when I’ve been so knocked down it’s hard to visualize standing again. I’m grateful I have a platform to share my story to help others who have made room in their own hearts for someone special they too never got to meet!”
Of course, for many women who have – or sadly may – experience the early loss of a child, the thought of feeling grateful may seem impossible, and that’s OK. But Mettling says while it’s not all she feels, she’s trying to make it the focus.
Listen: Former Head of Podcasts Monique Bowley talking about what has and hasn’t helped her through these last few weeks. Post continues after audio.
“I’m grateful for the mindset I’ve been working on daily the past two years and the fact that through all this pain I’m able to still see that there is purpose in all this madness! I’m sad, I’m heartbroken, I’m torn to pieces but I’m grateful!”
