CULT BUY: "The $11.99 moisturiser that dries in seconds and has saved my winter skin."

Note: This piece isn’t sponsored. Just a review of a bloody good product.

There are a number of irritating things that make me teeter on the edge of explosion every single day.

1. People who smell bad on public transport.
2. Feeling someone else’s chewing gum stuck to the bottom of a table.
3. Receiving a letter to remind me that my $770 car registration is due.
4. Co-workers heating up tuna in the office.
5. People who don’t stand to the left of the escalator. Just… MOVE THE EFF OVER .
6. Putting clothes on while my moisturiser is still all sticky and yuck.

Number five is precisely why we’re all here today. Just kidding, those people are ridiculous and will never, ever change. I recommend you carry a Chinese throwing star with you at all times and tada! They’ll move over quick smart.

We’re here to explore numero six: the moisturiser problem that has plagued women since the dawn of time.

We all want to have glowy, healthy, moistureful (that’s a word, yeah?) skin – we just don’t want things to touch us while those magical creams and potions are sinking in. The issue? Those products take so much time to get to work. And unless it’s the middle of summer, nobody wants to sit around being a rudie nudie for half an hour.

Also, we don’t have time. Like, any of it. We are busy and powerful and BUSY, so we just need our skin to look alive while we go about our very important days. We need to smack on some product, get dressed into a snazzy outfit and whip out the door, please.

I was depressed and scaly until one day, when I wandered into a chemist, one special little bottle surrounded by a halo of love and light and angel wings caught my attention.

Behold, dear sweet friends, the Garnier Body Ultimate Beauty Oil Nourishing Oil, $11.99 (a bit of a mouthful but stay with me).

It's not a moisturiser in a cream sense, but it's a beauty oil that does all the heavy lifting anyway. A blend of argan, macadamia, almond, and rose oil - this has saved my winter skin from dryness armageddon in just a few short weeks.

HALLE-BLOODY-LUJAH.

I use a couple of sprays on each arm and a few on each leg after the shower, and bam - within a few rubs my skin doesn't only look like sand paper anymore, the product has been completely absorbed and I can get dressed.

It's a time-saving, skin-brightening, life-affirming, soul-boosting miracle.

If you're sick of waiting for goo to sink into your skin, go grab some of this and be prepared to take on the world, lady friends.

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