My family used to be so close. What happened?
My siblings and I live within five minutes of each other, literally, and yet we go for weeks without seeing each other. It’s making me feel quite sad.
We used to be much closer, catching up at least once a week or once a fortnight at someone’s house. But as our children get older and life takes over, our closeness has started to fade. We’ve allowed this to happen and yet I’m not sure if we can fix it.
There are mitigating factors mixed up in all of this but I find myself wondering if our increasing remoteness from each other is permanent and just a natural life-stage?
Is it normal to go for weeks and weeks without seeing close family? It wasn’t always in my world. We’ve never been like this.
Something is wrong. I’m just not sure what it is. Maybe it’s years of slights and unresolved tensions. Maybe it’s the pressure of modern life.
Each of us is dealing with quite a lot in our individual lives which keeps us busy and distracted. There’s a divorce in progress, a massive rift between two, the launching of a new business, overseas travel and the starting of a new business. Add to that nine children between us (and a dog, two cats, a budgie and some fish) and it seems we’ve just become too busy for each other.
We are no longer prioritising each other. Maybe it’s because we need each other less?
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Same here. Although my family has less dramatic issues (thankfully no one is getting a divorce). But I recently had an epiphany about why we're just not in touch. (Really it's my in-laws side.) My epiphany was that we just stopped having fun with each other.
There is no more "friendly-trolling" of each other at get togethers for fear that someone will be disproportionately outraged. Nobody is allowed to act like a 'dag' anymore. Some have jealousy issues. Some are just too busy. We used to have fun together, we'd go camping, we'd go to the movies, we'd play board games, we'd go on holidays together. But now, we're all so friggin grown-up and it is BORING! Maybe that's because there are small children now and our focus is divided, making sure they're fed, safe, entertained and the energy, time and desire to connect with adult family members is just too exhausting.
I sigh wistfully for the "good old days" because I actually love each and every one of my in-laws, and I know that when all the facades are stripped down we can have a genuinely good time, and I know that they would be there for us if we were in need...maybe I should just be grateful for that alone! Maybe it is just this time in our lives and one day we'll reconnect and have genuine interactions again. :)
The good old days are long gone for me.
I live in the present......for myself.
It is what it is.
Make up with the sibling even though it's not your fault. Life's too short