By MAMAMIA TEAM
Do you ever take off your underwear to find little scorch marks on the crotch region?
Do you ever feel itchy or uncomfortable “down there“? And not like the thrush kind of uncomfortable – the there-could-be-a-dark-spirit-in-my-nether-regions kind of uncomfortable?
Do you ever hear voices whispering strange things to you in the middle of the night? Have you been attracting significant amounts of bad luck in your life and particularly IN THE BEDROOM? Do you have a vengeful ex-boyfriend or crush that is particularly proficient with curses?
The cause? You have DEMONS in your vagina!
That’s right. Vagina demons are a thing. No longer content to exist in old fireplaces or gravestones or, you know, hell, they are crawling to the warm, safe region that is just past your vulva.
But there’s no need to worry because for the small price of just $3,300, your vagina demons can be exorcised so that they never bother you again!
That’s not all – the first 300 callers will get an actual TAOIST PRIEST as their exorcist, to guarantee the greatest methods of success! Taoists priests have special supernatural powers and are much more effective than, you know, regular priests.
It’s so fast and easy – all you need to do is find yourself a hotel room, dress yourself in lingerie, and allow your body to be examined closely with a penis.
Call 1800EXORCISEME and have your credit card number ready to order now.