entertainment

20 life lessons from 90s cult classic Clueless.

FACT: Clueless is the best teen movie of all time.

Clueless, the cult classic based on Jane Austen’s Emma, is truly unmatched for fashion and for humour… also for jars. Where would we be without it?

It’s the film that taught us about the power of matchmaking. It introduced us to the term “surfing the crimson wave” and to the total Baldwin that is Paul Rudd. And perhaps most importantly, it reminded us that it does not say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty.

The best teen movie of all time. OF ALL TIME.

Today, the movie that made us all hanker for one of those outfit-generating computer program thingies turns 20 years old. So to celebrate its big day, here’s the definitive ranking of the top 20 Clueless moments and life lessons we all learned from the film.

1. The more the merrier.

Has there ever been a more rousing, passionate and moving speech in movie history? Um, probably.

But Cher still kinda nailed this one. Gregory Peck in To Kill a Mockingbird, eat your heart out.

2. Never settle.

When it comes to men, we should never take second best.

3. But when it comes to ‘snagging’ a man, there are a few simple steps to follow.

Exhibit A:

Show them your “domestic goddess” side.

 

4. Exhibit B:

This one is pretty self-explanatory. And it never fails… Oh Cher, the perfect combination of  provocative and wise.

5. Exhibit C:

Be sexy – at any cost.

6. Makeovers solve everything.

This was the makeover to end all makeovers. This is why Clueless has become such a teen movie staple.

7. Driving in platforms is HARD.

Driving is hard enough. But driving in platform heels? Impossible.

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8. It’s important to have things in common with your besties.

Cher and Dionne had a deep, meaningful relationship we all aspired to.

9. Don’t let your man disrespect you.

Even if street slang is an increasingly valid form of expression…

10. Never accept your first offer.

The power of negotiation will get you places.

11. There’s no shame in holding out for The One.

Exhibit A:

Why settle for a high school boy when there is LUKE freaking PERRY?

12. Exhibit B:

There’s nothing wrong with being selective.

13. Tartan is always a winning fashion choice.

Ditto berets, knee-high socks and a black back pack.

14. Words hurt.

That was way harsh, Tai.

15. Nothing says ROMANCE like Rollin’ With The Homies.

It spells true love.

16. You CAN find love with your step-brother.

Nothing weird about this at all…

17. You can always exploit your “female problems”.

Who didn’t use it as an excuse to get out of PE?

18. It’s important to be honest.

Communication is the key.

19. Everyone goes through tough times.

Even someone whose life resembles a Noxzema commercial.

20. Paul Rudd is a total Baldwin.

Um, duh. We didn’t need Clueless to teach us that.

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