"The moment my Christmas tree turned into my worst nightmare."

Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year.

The lights of the Christmas tree are twinkling. The carollers are carolling. Love Actually will be on TV.

And it is perfectly acceptable to pretend it’s winter.

Nailed it. Image via Giphy.

Until recently I believed that it was impossible for anything or anyone to burst my Christmas bubble. A perfect Christmas balance had been reached and I was merry and bright.

...That was, until my husband was turning the lights off on the Christmas tree and a killer spider fell viciously jumped onto his back. Said spider was a huntsman and he was big.


In the moment, I naturally offered my husband no support, ran away and screamed that "Christmas was ruined".

I love my Christmas tree A LOT. I dedicate an abnormal amount of time to putting it up and I spend way too much money on decorations that perfectly fit my Christmas theme.

So learning that my tree had been invaded by an eight-legged creature was news that hit me hard.

CHRISTMAS. IS. RUINED. Image via Giphy.


The world as I once knew it was changed forever and it felt a lot like spiders were crawling all over my body. I also had a number of unanswered questions and thoughts that bombarded my mind.

How long had the spider been living in our Christmas tree?

Was it in the tree when I put it up? Was I really that close to touching a spider?

Oh my goodness I nearly touched a spider.

Why? Just why?

Are there more spiders in the tree? If so, how many? 

Where is the spider now? Oh, it's dead. That's actually really sad.

I hope the spider's family are okay. (Post continues after gallery.)


Why am I crying? 

This is becoming really stressful. 

Is spraying the Christmas tree with spider spray over the top?

Will Windex work instead of spider spray? 

I think I'll just get a new tree. 

Wow Christmas trees are really expensive, surely I didn't pay this much?!

I'll just keep the old tree.

Tess and her tree, pre-spider discovery. (Supplied.)

But what if it happens again?

Am I on Candid Camera? This can't be my life. 

Will I ever sleep again? 

Every time I close my eyes I see spiders.

For those wondering about the fate of said spider, unfortunately it quickly became apparent the plastic pine needles that he had been inhabiting had not been providing sufficient spider nutrients because following his vicious attack he showed signs of fatigue and quickly died.

RIP Christmas tree invader, I'm sorry for screaming and being a little ridiculous when you popped in to say hello.

This piece was written tongue-in-cheek after a real life spider falling from the Christmas tree related incident. I am aware of the fact that there are bigger issues in the world and would like to stress that the spider was not murdered.