7 days ago, Christie Hayes had a miscarriage. She's honouring her baby with a special name.

It's been seven days since Christie Hayes had a miscarriage.

The Australian actor and radio presenter shared the news via her Instagram. She said she had been looking forward to sharing her happy news, but she was now in the unexpected position of speaking about the end to her pregnancy.

"I don't feel like I 'mis-carried' anything and I sure as hell didn't 'lose' my baby either. Ultimately, I now live with what happened. My pregnancy ended, I have experienced 'end of pregnancy'. I don't feel I lost our baby. The grief has been overwhelming, but I like to reflect on the joy. The little things," Hayes wrote this week.

Watch: Liz Ellis and Debra Lawrence share their experiences of miscarriage. Post continues below.

Video via Network 10. 

Hayes and her husband had found out they were expecting their "little Christmas gift" and were completely overjoyed.

She said they threw themselves into baby planning, picking out colours for the nursery, choosing baby names and downloading all the pregnancy apps. 

Then into the pregnancy, Hayes noticed she was bleeding. Initially, she felt it was "too much to be spotting, but not enough to panic".


"Google and everyone online mum forum possible at 2am told me bleeding was normal and can be a vast spectrum for everyone who is pregnant. Our phenomenal doctor offered me reassurance," Hayes wrote.

Sadly, Hayes had miscarried.

"I will always remember the kind and sensitive way my lovely doctor had to look me in the eye and confirm with me the worst news of my life. Then there was the agonising wait. The wait of more blood and pain. Waiting for nothing but waiting for everything."

Hayes explained that she felt conflicted whether to share her story so publicly, but in the end, decided she wanted to.

"Nothing I can do will bring our baby back, no amount of tears, and certainly not an Instagram post. However, I also don't want to keep the end of our pregnancy end a secret. I'd like to remember our baby with you."

She added: "Just like anybody else who is going through this grief knows, your baby mattered, our baby mattered, and I can't bear the thought of this precious time being forgotten or a secret."

Speaking with Mamamia, Hayes said she is taking comfort in the fact she is not alone. And in the past seven days, she has received an outpouring of messages from loved ones, and also strangers, who know how hard a miscarriage is.

She also feels discomfort in the term 'pregnancy loss'.

"I did debate to myself over and over whether talking about my 'pregnancy loss' — I don't like this phrase, as I more feel my pregnancy was stolen from me," she explained to us.


There's a grief that is hard to describe as well — wondering what colour hair her baby would have had, the sound of their voice. But she finds solace in knowing just how loved her baby is.

"In my heart I will forever feel I am a mother to my three babies. I loved them all the second hey were in my belly, and nothing can every take that away from you."


Sharing the news of the miscarriage with their eight-year-old son Harley was also challenging.

"He wanted to call the baby 'Sunflower'. And so, that's what we did."

In an effort to celebrate their 'Sunflower', Hayes shared a series of pictures from the experience. It included the moment Hayes and her husband found out they were expecting, a picture of the pregnancy journal she was gifted, as well as a private selfie Hayes had sent her husband of her exhausted at home and happily pregnant. She also shared an image of a bunch of sunflowers that her sisters had sent following the news of the miscarriage. 

"For anyone else who has experienced the grief of a pregnancy end — your baby mattered, just as our baby mattered, and for a brief time and space, they were right here beside us. I celebrate your baby as I celebrate ours," Hayes wrote.

"And to our beautiful Sunflower — daddy and mummy love you infinitely in this life, and the next. Wherever you are, I will miss you every day until we are together again."

If this has raised any issues for you or if you would like to speak with someone, please contact the Sands Australia 24-hour support line on 1300 072 637. 

You can download Never Forgotten: Stories of love, loss and healing after miscarriage, stillbirth, and neonatal death for free here.

Feature Image: Instagram @christiehayes_.