I can’t hold onto a long-term relationship.
Guys lose patience. I lose their interest.
I can’t help it if I work at a startup where it might take 8 hours until I respond back to their text. Nor can I promise my weekends to them. Work is just too important to me.
Sure, I can split 50–50 between a relationship and work (as many of you would suggest), but I’d only be half-assing at both. At this point, I can only choose one.
A conversation from seven years ago, when I was still with my ex:
“Tiffany, I want you to be serious with me for the next 10 minutes. I tried applying for a crap-ton of jobs, and let’s just say things aren’t going the way I expected. You know my dad in China? He told me there’s a diamond store I can run and that I can be part of his team for his real estate projects. I know China might not be the place for you, but the best opportunities are there right now.
“…Tiffany, I love you — inside and out. But I want you to have a choice. You can either come with me to China and we can be together. Or you can stay here with your mum and dad, find a job, and grow your career. It’d make me super happy if you chose to be with me, but I will also be happy for you if you decide to make your life here. But know that if you choose to stay, I can’t promise that we’ll still be together. Long distance is tough — your day is my night, my day is your night.
“So how about this? Think about what I said, talk to your mum and dad. Then tell me what you want to do.”
I was completely split between these two decisions.
Do I want to give up this 3+ year relationship I had going for a stable life? Or should I follow my heart and hope my future would be better off than what I have now?
With that, I chose love.
China wasn’t my ideal place to live in
Imagine for a second that it’s the 1950s, and you’re walking down the streets of New York City. You’ve got air pollution clouding the 30th floor of skyscrapers. People fighting to get onboard a jam-packed bus. Cars honking every five seconds.