Something wild happened today and we don’t want to sound dramatic but… life will never be the same again.

Universal Pictures released the first trailer for the movie adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musicalCatsand look, it’s a ride.

Take a look for yourself. Post continue below video.

There’s a lot going on: Jason Derulo is… there, for some reason. Taylor Swift has completed her metamorphosis from cat lady to lady cat. Somehow the cats are both human sized and cat sized.

Our thoughts and feelings are frankly all over the place and as communication is key, we must discuss it all.

It’s left us with so many questions, most of which we have never once – not even for a second – thought about before. This is a safe space, so let’s get to it.

1. Why are the cats… human? Wait, or is it why are the humans… cats?

Oh.

This is like some sick hybrid species and we are baffled.

Cats don't walk on their hind legs (but oh god, IMAGINE). They don't have 10 fingers. Humans absolutely do not have tails coming out of their butts.

We don't even want to think about how this came to be.

2. Why did they have to have such human bums BUT WITH A TAIL HANGING OUT OF IT!?

Yes, caps lock was necessary because LOOK AT IT:

MAKE

IT

STOP

3. Why do they have bums and boobs but no other... bits?

Please explain.

On the bright side, this means these nightmare creatures cannot procreate. But hey, it is a movie...shall we suspend disbelief?

4. What's the litter box situation like?

Wait... No. We don't want the answer to this one.

5. How is Idris Elba still hot?

THESE FEELINGS WE ARE HAVING ARE NOT OKAY.

.....................Help us.

6. Why do only some of the cats wear clothing?

A few follow-up questions here:

Judi, WHAT DID YOU DO?

7. Is this what cats sound like to themselves?

We hear "meow" and they hear "MEMORY, ALL ALONE IN THE MOOOOONLIGHT" sung by Jennifer Hudson.

8. Are we high right now?

We don't recall taking anything... but... surely...

It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real It's not real

Ahhh.

We're glad we worked through that. See you at the ticket queue.

Catswill be released on December 20. Merry ChrisMEOWs.