There’s a mythological Cosmopolitan sex tip, which goes something along the lines of: ‘Tie a piece of ribbon in a bow around your partner’s penis and then use you teeth to unwrap it like a present.’
We can only assume the ‘sexpert’ who came up with it gave up their career in women’s magazines for one in women’s fashion and is probably solely responsible for the sartorial abomination that is the ‘Body Bow’.
The ASOS offering appears to be some sort of Chrissy present-lingerie hybrid, which has home shoppers ‘WTF’-ing all over their social media feeds.
Basically, it looks like this:
You just said 'WTF', didn't you? Admit it. Source: ASOS
Honestly, we're not quite sure what to make of the "Unwrap Me" Body Bow, which retails at an affordable $35 and comes in three colours.
For starters, is it for the boudoir or the outside world? I mean, it's not lingerie in so far as there's no way you could discreetly fit it under your work shirt.
Apparently it can be tied in a number of ways too, though it's not at all clear what these are.
Oh, and it comes in a "mesh pouch" for some reason.
Suffice to say, we're not the only ones confused about what this is or who it is for, as evidenced by the range of bemused reactions from Twitter users:
The other big question is, how easy is this thing to untie?
Like, what if it gets caught in the car door when I'm heading to the local shops? Will I be left standing in my birthday suit in the middle of the Woolies car park?
I guess there's only one way to find out...
*Adds to cart*