Let’s set the scene.
You’re standing in front of the lady you’ve been trying to woo.
You’re clutching a rose in your hand.
A producer out of shot informs you that, yes, Blake, your moment has arrived.
You’ve never done this before. I mean, you’ve been given roses from that chick Sophie, and then last week from your precious lady love. But giving the rose? This is big for you. Huge.
It’s time to give your lovely lady her flower, and cement this “thing” for another couple of days.
You smile. God, she’s so pretty. This will be such a sweet, authentic, televised moment.
Now, all you need is for her name to leave your mouth. Pretty darn simple, really. You have been sharing cocktails and mud baths for about a week now.
Your lips part. The heart of a nation swells. Everyone can see that this is clearly true love.
“Lenora,” you say, maintaining fierce eye-contact with your lass.
But she doesn’t move.
She… won’t… move.
LENORA, WHY WON’T YOU MOVE?
Is she… rejecting you?
“… Laurina,” Keira (or is it Kirojo? Or Kelina?) announces.
Ohhhhh. Yes. That’s right. The woman you’ve been talking to day in, day out is named Laurina.
This is bad. It’s real bad. Well, actually, not as bad as that time you tried to commit revenge porn, but it’s definitely not ideal.
Love Bach In Paradise? Listen to Zara McDonald and Michelle Andrews recap tonight’s episode below.