Whenever Kim Kardashian, 35, feels a little neglected by the world, she posts a nude selfie to Instagram. Generally she likes to emphasise either her breasts, or her buttocks — a phenomenon that’s spawned its own term: the belfie.
Her latest effort, a full-frontal mirror variety selfie with black bars covering nips and nethers, failed to have much effect. The internet certainly didn’t break as it did the first time we saw her huge shiny arse on the cover of Paper magazine.
In fact, it was all a little bit yawn, and Bette Midler, 70, really hit the nail on the head as to why.
Kim Kardashian tweeted a nude selfie today. If Kim wants us to see a part of her we’ve never seen,
she’s gonna have to swallow the camera.
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) March 7, 2016
LOL, Bette, lol. Her observation was so spot on, I got to thinking: what other gems are buried within Bette Midler’s Twitter account? Behold, Midler take-downs of everyone from Donald Trump to the Oscars.
Unemployment is at 4.9% announces the Labor Dept. However, I trust my experts at Trump University who tell me it’s at “a gazillion percent.” — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) March 5, 2016
2. Good question, Bette.
Is it time to bring back the Chia Pet? — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) March 5, 2016
The Oscars are today! You know, the awards show where Leonardo DiCaprio is “overdue” but black people can “wait till next year.” — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 28, 2016
4. Kim Kardashian’s mother Kris Jenner.
KrisJenner booed at a concert while intro’ing Culture Club; that’s the last time anyone says “Kris Jenner” & “Culture” in the same sentence. — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 25, 2016
5. Global warming and necessary remakes.
Oceans found to be rising at the fastest rate in 2800 years. If they do a remake of Beaches one day, they’ll have to set it in Oklahoma!
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 23, 2016
6. She gets Formation.
Jay-Z reportedly sent Beyonce 10,000 roses before her Super Bowl performance. I guess he really wanted to go to Red Lobster later.
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 9, 2016
7. Dropping stuff.
Everyone’s going nuts because @Beyoncé dropped a new video. So?I drop stuff all the time. These days, it’s picking up stuff that’s hard! — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) February 7, 2016
8. Living without bitterness.
I’m glad it was Oprah who got that 5-year $43 million Weight Watchers contract. I would have just spent it all on candy.
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) January 5, 2016
9. NECESSARY REMAKES.
Sylvester Stallone is starring in ANOTHER Rocky movie. And he’s my age! By now, I should be doing Beaches 8: Electric Boogaloo! — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) November 28, 2015
10. Obliterating ISIS.
If we’re looking to defeat ISIS, just wait until Thanksgiving. After dinner, every drunk uncle in America will unveil his foolproof plan!
— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) November 18, 2015
11. Justin Bieber referring to her as “Britt Meddler”.
If you were in any doubt as to Bette’s radness, watch her with Lily Tomlin in Big Business. CLASSIC.