friendship

Are you the organiser of your group? Here are six things you'll know to be deeply true.

In every friendship group, there is an organiser.

Recognised by their signature A-type personality and ability to whip up a batch of muffins with minimal notice, they are the mayonnaise holding everything together.

I am this person. And if you’re here, let’s presume you are too.

I think I speak for most of us when I say, although we quite enjoy the smug feeling of knowing we’ve made things happen, it gets old at times.

Here are six things about being the organiser you know to be deeply, deeply true.

Once the organiser, always the organiser.

While it’s likely you initially shouldered this responsibility by choice, putting your hand up to organise a sleepover 13 YEARS AGO was not you saying you wanted to organise every single get-together for the rest of your sorry life.

It was ONE time. Not a binding contract signed in blood.

But unfortunately, people who aren’t us are lazy. Therefore, you really only have your own assertive arse to blame.

ONE TIME. Image: Giphy

You see the very worst of humanity.

Being the gate keeper of events and invitations exposes you to the very worst of humanity.

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Without getting specific, PEOPLE WHO CLICK ATTENDING AND CANCEL LAST MINUTE ARE THE WORST.

These humans are closely followed by people who claim they've transferred money for the group gift and haven't, and the ones who bring a plus one to an intimate gathering at which you were ready to divulge the most personal details of your life but now can't because I'm sorry but I don't know who this person is.

Nothing gets done without you.

If we may speak candidly, our friends would literally melt into a gooey, anti-social mess without us around to organise every group present or wine tour.

It doesn't make us angry. Just... disappointed.

Because of such incompetence, you can literally never put the tools down. Ever. Unless you want to face the look of hurt in Bec's eyes when she realises no one got her anything for her birthday.

Expectations of reciprocation are non-existant.

Because you've conditioned your friends into the comfort zone of knowing things will always be organised for them, you can pretty much guarantee you will never have something to your impeccable standard organised for you.

No surprise parties or thoughtful birthday flowers sent to your office.

Deep down, you know this to be true. And it kills you a bit more every time you remember.

LISTEN: Got trust issues? Here are four questions to ask yourself next time you're unsure about your friends (post continues after audio...)

You always have to message first.

Like a Bumble match, your friends will ~disappear~ unless you make the first move and message them first.

Sometimes, you secretly test them to see how many days you can go without hearing from them.

This usually ends in despair on day 22, or when you actually really need to tell someone something and can't wait for them to get their act together.

Your friends bloody love you.

Your ability to organise a shindig like it's nobody's business is just one of the many reasons your mates keep you around.

You're loyal, compassionate and love making people feel special, which is why your friends love you to bits and hope you never leave their disorganised bums for better options.

Are you the organiser in your friendship group? What other things do you know to be true?

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