By ALEX LILLY
I’d let my parents arrange my marriage.
Wait. Although my mum’s side of the family is Indian and arranged marriages have happened within my extended family, I’m not talking about that kind of ‘arranged’, the one that involves a 12 year-old girl being whisked off to somewhere like India or Pakistan/Afghanistan/any country with the suffix ‘-stan’, forced to marry a sweaty, balding, 50 year-old man.
I don’t mean like that.
Just to clarify, I am certainly in no hurry to get married and I’m not even from a traditional Indian family. I just turned 20, I’m half way through my degree and even though I have a boyfriend I’m pretty happy with, I am nowhere near ready to be a wife.
But if I were ever single and ready to find my better half, my parents would be the first people I would go to for guidance.
Modern arranged marriages are very different. These days, if the girl were keen, then her parents (only with her full consent, of course) would try to find someone who fits her requirements of looks, religion, career and if they’re from a good family, for example. The girl will receive photos and can reject as many people she likes. When she meets someone who she clicks with, they’ll meet up, get to know each other and the rest is pretty straightforward. Done.
Plus, if you’ve ever seen Bend it like Beckham, you’ll know that the Indian community is like a slick communication network that will be able to find you plenty of suitable candidates. Like eHarmony, but better.
Although many people think it’s all about religion and ancient culture, the modern process has its benefits. So here are four reasons why I would let my parents be my wing man and woman…
Number 1: Values
They have the same as I do, ranging from political beliefs to sense of humour. Not only have my parents taught me what sort of person I should be, I would trust them to spot someone who they thought I would be compatible with. And even though my mum likes to dress our dogs up and my dad’s ‘dad jokes’ are cringe-worthy at times, they have got their heads screwed on properly and would be pretty good matchmakers if the time came.
Number 2: I don’t want to get divorced. Ever.
Arranged marriages used to be about keeping the culture alive and although it sounds clinical and unromantic, it’s actually quite effective, especially with divorce rates skyrocketing. Don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of falling head over heels with my own Mr. Darcy and all that old-fashioned romance, but when it all boils down, I want a marriage that my husband and I would be happy in.