This is something I wrote one night last week. I’ve thought long and hard about whether I wanted to share this. I know what some people will think. But what’s more important than that is what I want you all to keep in mind and be aware of.
I’m sitting here sobbing great big fat tears.
I’ve just done the worst thing. I am a horrible mum.
Tonight, I put Harry and Aoife in the bath together, played with them for a bit, then remembered I had washing to put away. So I went around the corner just a few metres to hang up one of my husband’s shirts. I didn’t hear anything out of the ordinary, just a tiny bit of splashing.
I went back to the bathroom maybe 15-30 seconds later (I really have no idea, it was very quick) and Aoife was under water flailing around. Harry was laughing. I grabbed her so fast out of that bath and held her to me…she was coughing and screaming. Harry suddenly realised she wasn’t playing and his face fell.
It could have been so much worse. Aoife is fine. She coughed briefly, cried for a little bit while I held her and cried myself, then was back to her usual smiling self a few minutes later. She fed as normal and went off to sleep happy.
But still…what I did was completely unacceptable.