“DON’T JUDGE ME BUT… I have the worst sleeping patterns out of anyone I've ever met."

Welcome to a safe-space series in which women (and occasionally men) confess the stuff they don’t feel they can say out loud let alone share publicly. Because sometimes sharing is a relief. No judgement.

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“I’ve never had healthy sleeping patterns.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been the type of person who went to bed late and got up late. When I was a teenager it wasn’t so much of an issue. If family members heard I woke up at 1pm they’d laugh it off, putting it down to typical adolescent laziness.

But then I became an adult. And my sleeping patterns, no matter what my schedule looked like, remained terrible.

Sure, I can maintain a 9-5 schedule during the week, but when I have a day off, I revert straight back to my 16-year-old self.

Last weekend, for example, I woke up at 5pm. IT WAS GETTING DARK. I can’t explain the feeling of waking up, thinking you may have slept in a little late, and then realising the entire day is gone. 

There’s nothing that attracts judgment quite like poor sleeping patterns. The early birds, who wake up at 5am, getting their errands done by 8 and spending the rest of the day living wholly productive lives, love to tell you how no matter how hard they try, they just can’t sleep in. It’s in their nature. There’s just so much to do! When the sun rises, their body naturally does, too.

Listen: How to get your teens off their phones at night. Post continues…

But it doesn’t work like that for me.

There have been several times in my life where I’ve described myself as “going nocturnal”. Not because my work or schedule demanded it – just because my body seemed to instinctively head in that direction.

When I worked nights at a bar (not finishing particularly late, maybe 11pm), I would go home, watch hours of TV, go to sleep in the early hours of the morning, and wake in the late afternoon.

No part of me enjoys it. But it feels like I can’t wake up.

As an adult, it’s not socially acceptable to have these poor sleeping habits. It’s expected that you’ll wake up early on weekends, and get all those pesky little tasks done that build up during the week.

For the most part, I try desperately to hide my sleeping patterns. If a friend messages me on a Saturday morning, I’ll reply on Saturday afternoon saying, ‘sorry! I went for a walk and forgot my phone!’

I’d never admit the truth.

I’m worried if people knew, they’d think I couldn’t possibly be a productive human being. But honestly – I am. Just at different hours.” Tanya, 28.

Do you struggle with your sleeping patterns? Is it OK to be an adult who sleeps in all day? Let us know in the comments below.