It is a true fact that Australians do not love anything quite like they love Sophie Monk.
So when Osher introduces this season of The Bachelorette he is not at all coping with the excitement.
He’s speaking a little loudly. He doesn’t know what to do with his… hands. His bow- tie is on slightly crooked, because he put it on in a hurry.
It would be an honour to have THE Sophie Monk fall in love under his watch. This is a responsibility he takes very seriously, and he has been up all night making very important preparations.
SHHH. Quiet, pls.
It's time to meet Sophie, and everyone act cool.
She's walking along a beach with a dog and tbh we can't really see much missing from her life. She talks about her career and how a bunch of her relationships have been failures and goddamn Sophie Monk is a national hero and these men best understand that.
It's important we're reminded in the opening minutes that she's 37 and single and wants children ASAP, and that women must always choose between a) love/family and b) a successful career. We write that down in our diaries so we do not forget.
POST CONTINUES BELOW. Listen to Michelle Andrews and Zara McDonald debrief on tonight's episode of The Bachelorette.
Anywho time is running out, so it's time to meet the men who better treat her real good.
Osher greets Sophie and asks what she's looking for in a man. She insists she doesn't care about looks, and just wants someone who "wants MWEE for MWEE" and so true.
The first man we meet is Apollo which definitely sounds like a made up name. He's a magician which we're also pretty sure isn't a real occupation, and opens with a ridiculous trick. It's clear that Sophie is (justifiably) both confused and frustrated by magic.