Warning: This articles deals with suicide and may be distressing for some readers.
After posting a final “f*ck y’all” to Twitter in the early hours of December 5th, 23-year-old August Ames took her own life.
The adult film actress (real name Mercedes Grabowski) was found dead in a park in California at 3.45 on Tuesday morning, The Blast reports. She left a note apologising to her parents.
Her brother believes the internet killed her. Ames was the target of cyber bullying in the hours before her death, with people labelling her “homophobic” and threatening violence.
Several weeks before she died, on September 13, Ames spoke publicly about suffering sexual abuse as a child and struggling with depression and bipolar disorder.
“I try to do therapy. I hate that word. I hate therapy,” Ames told the Holly Randall Unfiltered podcast, as reported by The Independent.
She said she was struggling to deal with memories of the abuse she suffered as a child. “It was just awful. It’s still recent where I have to keep myself occupied or else I start thinking about all that sh*t and then I fall into a depression.”
And, when she tried to seek psychological help, she said she was often judged for her profession.
“I would get in contact with some people and then I would feel badly because they’d be like ‘what’s your profession and I’d be like ‘oh, I’m in the adult industry’ and then I’d feel like they’re like ‘oh, that’s the whole reason that you are the way you are’ and then I’d get turned off.”
Ames revealed herself as a woman who, at 15, was asked to strip for cocaine by the father she was babysitting for. Someone whose moods could “flip” in a way that was “crippling”. A porn actress who wasn’t treated equally by the people she asked for help.
Remember these details, when you read about the way the internet assaulted her in the 24 hours before her death.
“Cyber bullying cost me my baby sister’s life,” Ames’ brother James Grabowski told The Sun on Thursday. “I want my sister’s death to be recognised as a serious issue – bullying is not OK.”