My wedding happened a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. I know it did. We have photographic evidence to the tune of $2,000.00. (I’m told that’s cheap.) There’s a dress hanging in the closet, and a piece of paper with a stamp on it.
But I’ll be honest, my wedding doesn’t feel like the most important day of my life. We danced and sliced up a cake. If I could’ve skipped it, I would’ve. Just like I skipped every graduation since high school. Our culture has too many ceremonies. We need to chill.
Even my proposal didn’t need a bunch of fireworks. It wasn’t filmed or photographed. He didn’t get down on one knee. We’re both practical adults. A little jaded and roughed over. We just had an evolving conversation. Then one day he showed me a ring and said, “Do you want to get married?”
I smiled and said, “Yeah.”
And then we had sex to celebrate.
I’m not saying ditch weddings altogether. But they just don’t matter that much to some people. That doesn’t make you a bad spouse. A small wedding doesn’t doom your marriage. In fact, I’ve read that bigger weddings have a higher divorce rate. Go figure.
Here’s the big secret: Maybe I’m wrong, but it looks like the people who dread their weddings are the ones who stay married the longest.
That makes sense. You’re looking forward to the rest of your life with your partner. All that expensive planning is just stress and a bill.
And yet, somewhere in the country there’s a bride-to-be freaking out about her dress — right this second. A groom’s mulling over the prospect of his bachelor party as the last chance he’ll ever get to visit a strip club.