sex

"I had an anal orgasm in a hotel room in Bangkok."

I had an anal orgasm in a hotel room in Bangkok.

Here I was in Bangkok, home of sweaty nightclubs, delicious fried foods and fake Gucci. I didn’t exactly explore the city inside out, but my boy…its-complicated-because-he’s-travelling-for-a-year…friend explored my body back to front. Well, mainly my back…side.

He explored my ass. My bum and I have a weird relationship.

It’s not a bad ass. It does the job, I just thought having boobies was my thing so, you wouldn’t catch me in booty hugging jeans or twerking on the dance floor.

Then I met Mr. Ass man.

It was love at first g-string for this guy. He would smack it, bite it, have sex with it, paper mache’ it and always want photos of it. Have you ever tried taking photo of your own ass? Round of applause to the ladies that can nail that shot… maybe consider a career change… Cirque du Soliel perhaps?

January 2019 ass man asks me to meet him in Bangkok.

I accept despite getting hit with food poisoning only days before.

There’s one thing I knew…

I was not just going to bang cock in Bangkok. I bought Imodium from the chemist.

I was prepared to do just about anything for this guy. Shitting myself in front of him just wasn’t one of them.

After spending approximately two hours curling and re curling my hair alone in our sixty square meter hotel room I heard a knock at the door.

My face curled up into a Brady Bunch smile and I skipped to the door.

He was taller than I remembered.

He was more tanned.

He was Tarzan vine swinging gorgeous.

He picked me up, I wrapped my legs around him and he kissed me hard.

He pushed me against the wall… maybe because I was a dead weight in his arms or maybe so he could push his hard dick up against me.

I peeled off his T-shirt.

He dropped me to the floor, turned me around and pulled up my white tennis inspired mini skirt to reveal my carefully chosen pink g-string.

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He pulled the string aside and licked my ass. Pleasure shot through my whole body. It felt better than 5pm on a Friday, an M&M ice cream and no lines at the airport combined.

A spank, kiss and a blowjob later we were still in bed rolling around, refreshing our memories of each other with every touch, lick and suck.

I was on my hands and knees on the huge queen mattress when he got up and stood behind me. He began to brush his huge, quite pretty and not at all dinosaur-like dick against my ass hole. He pushed gently. The tip began to open me up. We had experimented with anal sex before so I knew the drill.

In order to “do it” I have to breath very deeply and think only about my breath. Sure, its not that sexy but I was giving the guy the golden snitch of sex acts so I wasn’t too worried.

Before I had time to think about whether the Imodium had worked we were having real deal anal sex. He was fucking me properly in my tiny butt hole. It was actually working.

I felt so full.

There’s no other way to describe it.

I felt paralysed from the waist down.

I didn’t want to seem like a starfish but the sensation was so intense I was afraid to move in case the feeling would go away.

It built and it built and it built.

Then… the stars aligned, fireworks went off and Whitney Houston was in the corner of the room singing to me.

I had an anal orgasm.

It was similar to an internal g-spot orgasm from sex but deeper, more full bodied and it went for longer.

We collapsed.

We kissed.

I melted into his arms like butter on a white bread roll.

So, I didn’t get to explore Thailand much on this trip but I will mark this experience down as one of the best-guided tours to date. Not quite one to write about on Trip Adviser but one I’d recommend all the same.

And guess what?

I didn’t even shit myself.

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