Sshhh. Listen really hard. Can you hear that?
Clicking of cameras. Drumming of high heels. Shallow breaths because dresses are so tight they don’t allow deep-breathing.
It’s the sound of celebrities walking the red carpet.
The 2014 American Music Awards have started, and all the top musicians are there. Taylor Swift is performing (may even bring along a surprise horse). Jennifer Lopez, Jessie J, One Direction and many others are performing. Miley Cyrus may twerk and lick a hammer, but she’s like that.
And PRESENTERS. There are lots of famous presenters. They get to stand at the microphone and give awards that they did not win, but they do it graciously and prettily. Heidi Klum will do it. Kendall and Kylie Jenner will do it. Kanye West may jump up on stage and try to steal the limelight from someone, but he’s like that.
Our own Iggy Azalea, the most successful female rap artist to ever come from Mullumbimby, New South Wales (so far), is nominated for two and a half million awards. Well, six. But that is A LOT. She may win Artist Of The Year, Single Of The Year, Favourite Female Artist… That should stop Snoopy Douchey Douche from being so rude.
And the best part of the night? Lorde’s incredible performance of ‘Yellow Flicker Beat’ from The Hunger Games soundtrack. Accompanied by some amazing fan girl dance moves from Taylor Swift.