rogue

We need to talk about the orca uprising.

The orcas are acting weird.

In the Strait of Gibraltar, off the coast of Spain, the species are striking yachts. For those impacted, it's probably quite scary. For everyone else, it's the greatest clapback of all time.

The narrative, hypothesised by researchers, is this: an orca (aka killer whale) known as White Gladis suffered a "critical moment of agony" with a boat. So, through the dolphin equivalent of word of mouth, the entire orca population is pissed.

Since 2020, there have been hundreds of incidents and even three sunken ships. 

Boat captain Dan Kriz has been 'attacked' twice. In 2020, his boat rudder was destroyed by orcas. Then in April, it was targeted again.

"We were about to cross shipping lines and turn south to Canary Islands when we felt like we got hit bad with a wave, but with the second hit, we realised that the same situation from 2020 was happening," he told Newsweek

"My first reaction was, 'Please! Not again.' There is not much one can do. They are very powerful and smart."

It sounds scary, of course, but also a little funny.

Despite also being known as killer whales, wild orcas are not considered a threat to humans and there has never been a fatal orca attack on humans in the wild.

They rarely care about us. But suddenly, they seem a tad mad at our boats.

Enter: human projection, memes and people with a Canva subscription.

Experts have been attempting to point out that the so-called orca uprising might be... not that. 

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Other hypotheses include that they're just playing, socialising or engaging in 'fad' behaviour. Past behaviour patterns, including an academic article that observed various orcas wearing a fish on their head like a hat, back that up.

Just when you thought this story couldn't get more bizarre! Fish hats!

The species might just be having a bit of fun, but word quickly spread across the internet about orcas with a grudge, acting like a vengeful gang with White Gladis as their head honcho.

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We liked that story a lot. Nature fighting back? Animals defending themselves after decades of whaling, fishing and just, uh, general disrespect towards their habitat is a tale most of us can get behind.

Poetic justice, etc.

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Orcas are extremely intelligent creatures. 

They have group and social systems, they cooperate and coordinate, and they pass on skills like hunting throughout generations, which makes them an especially fun species to project our human thoughts, feelings and politics onto.

And while we feel helpless to the world's mess (sorry, this funny little story about angry dolphins just got deep), the orcas have become our anti-establishment icons.

And I, for one, would welcome our new orca overlords – although I draw the line at wearing a fish hat.

Fin. (Sorry).

Feature image: Getty/Mamamia.

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