As I watched the Meghan Markle and Prince Harry interview - and let's face it, who didn't watch it - I knew exactly where she was coming from. It is an awful thing to say, but my parents were also concerned about the skin colour of my children.
In my early 30s, I ran from an engagement to the wrong guy and fled to Far North Queensland. It was my chance to find myself, to enjoy myself, to party, to let loose, and that I did. It was one of the best decisions of my life. I found a best friend and I eventually found the guy that I was meant to marry.
So, you can imagine how excited I was to talk to my family about this new guy.
“I think this one might stick,” I said.
What does he do for work? How old is he? The usual questions were fired at me by my mother and father, all with pleasing results.
Then I revealed that he was Aboriginal. A proud Butchulla man, from Hervey Bay, Queensland. Their tone changed, my parents became hesitant, they became cautious, they became worried.
They were worried about the reactions of others. How the world would perceive our interracial relationship. My parents knew about the hardships faced by our First Nations people, hardships they continue to face every day. They wanted to protect me from that.
Watch: Awkward questions I get asked as a young Aboriginal woman. Post continues below.
As all parents do, they wanted to protect me from any heartache. I will always remember when my father turned to me and asked: “What about your children?”
Again, the question was asked with love and concern; he was worried.
He knew the battles that they would face. Would they be judged unfairly? Life expectancy, employment rates and literacy levels continue to be lower for our First Nations people. Did I really want to have children in this world? Did I want to marry and have children with a man who continues to face racism, when I had the option of keeping my head in the sand and staying in my white privileged world?
Well, the answer is yes. Yes, I married the heck out of that man!
We have been together for nearly seven years now and have recently welcomed our second daughter into the world. We are raising our daughters to be strong and proud First Nations people, proud Butchulla women. Yes, there is a battle in my children’s lives that would not have been there if I had married a white man.
As a white woman, raising Aboriginal children I have faced questions like: “She doesn’t look like you, is that your daughter?” and “Why is her skin so dark?”
I answer them openly, honestly and with pride. My daughter and I recently attended our first Change the Date rally and it won't be our last.
Our daughters will be taught to speak up, to make their voices heard, to fight. Fight for their people, culture and true reconciliation and acknowledgement.
My parents were coming from a place of love and maybe my white privileged life would have been easier. My children now get to learn and find strength in the stories of their ancestors, their land and their culture which is both black and white.
This is what makes our daughters stronger, more resilient, more proud. My parents now see their uneducated and ignorant views, inluenced by their white British upbringing, were wrong. And out of love, for me, my husband and their granddaughters, my parents too have joined our fight.
Feature image: Supplied.
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