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Fridays are supposed to be fun, but I’m about to ruin your whole goddamn day and I’m really sorry about it.
I have… terrible news.
Paparazzi photos of The Bachelorette final four have been released and it’s not what we wanted (There are spoilers below, so proceed with caution… But if you’re brave enough, there’s also some truly spectacular artwork that makes it worth it).
Mamamia’s super fan meets the bachelorette Angie Kent. Post continues below video.
The Daily Mail have published photos of Angie Kent’s final four standing bachelors, and there’s only one long-haired man among them.
It’s… not Ciarran, the man I described as the “love child of Lucius Malfoy and Austin Powers” before the series began, but now exclusively call “angel”.
Let us take a moment to grieve.
Sigh.
According to the photos, we'll be visiting the hometowns of dog guy Ryan, sunflower king Timm, Carlin (and his face) and hot penguin Jackson.
The photos from August 5 show the four men filming scenes at the Bachelorette mansion. They're all casually dressed, probably on a group date, before other photos show them in their cocktail party suits.
Mamamia does not publish paparazzi photos, but who really needs to when I'm willing to put the time and effort into recreating them as pieces of literal art?
The below drawings are just as great, if not better, than the actual pics and I'll be setting up an Etsy page to sell them as prints ASAP, promise.
First, I present the men leaning against a fence (though I forgot to... draw... the fence):
Then they shuffle to behind a flowery fence so Timm can also put his arm around Ryan:
A quick costume change for Jackson...
Gotta keep hydrated:
Ciarran may be gone, but this may just be best dressed cocktail party yet:
And finally, it was important to include this cameo from Super Osh™ himself:
Angie was also captured, wrapped up with a blanket in her cocktail party dress but... I know my limits.
(I don't know why you would, after such detailed artistic impressions, but if you want to see the real photos you can do so here).
So, there we have it. The final four revealed. Is anyone else still crying?
Catch up on the full story on our daily entertainment podcast The Spill.
Top Comments
Maybe that's because he's the Bach that goes home due to death of gtandmother
So, perhaps Ciarren is still available... next Bachelor, perhaps?
Yes please! Finally we have someone who is real, quirky and very individual. When he first arrived on the scene I thought nope, no way, but I judged too soon and he has fast become one of my most favourite contestants ever.
I think he would be fun, especially if they actually tried to find him some women who suited him, not just the usual crowd of wannabe influencers.