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The 'ugly duckling' curse: Matt Agnew is every suddenly-hot guy who's ever dated.

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I once dated a guy who I thought was the ultimate catch. He had a man bun, wore linen shirts, and was almost offensively yoga-toned.

He also cheated on me repeatedly, which I discovered six months into our relationship. When I broke up with him, in a rare moment of vulnerability he revealed his secret: he wasn’t always this confident, handsome lothario.

Crippled with insecurities, he had spent the better part of his life getting walked all over by women for being the ‘nice guy.’ He was sick of being friend-zoned, so he rebranded himself.

Women noticed. And once he got a taste, he couldn’t get enough of his newfound..credentials.

This year’s Bachelor, Matt Agnew, was marketed to us as a lovable geek with a regular beach-jogging habit. He liked working out, AFL and cooking. So far, so normal.

He was supposed to be the anti-Honey Badger - an answer to last year's finale fiasco. A down-to-earth, non-famous guy genuinely looking for love.

And by no means are we doubting that Matt is in it for the right reasons, as they say. Hell, he seems more committed than any Bach who came before to finding a future wife/baby-mama. He also seems like a very nice human, unlike my philandering ex.

BUT. There's a but.

We all know Matt had a glow-up. It's been exceedingly well-publicised. He's been perfectly packaged to us - Beauty And The Geek-style - as an "ugly duckling" who has become the handsome prince.

My theory is that under the big goofy grin and the tight, collared shirts and the perfect hair, there's a little boy.

Once upon a time, that little boy was too busy playing XBox in his room and drinking slurpies to get girls.

Then he got buff. He was cast as The Bachelor. He had a TV makeover. He found himself surrounded by 24 eligible women. Women throwing themselves at him and competing for his affections.

And we can imagine it's hard to keep your cool in that situation. But right now I kind of want to pull Matt to the side and say dude...chill. You seem real thirsty.

Whenever I watch Matt with Abbie, I'm reminded of an episode of Seinfeld where Jerry finds himself sexually attracted to a woman he can't stand. He imagines a scene between his brain and his "little Jerry," where the two body parts fight it out for who'll win.

When Matt is with Abbie, this dual seemingly comes into play and logical reasoning goes out the door.

Abbie represents every girl that Matt, dare we say, didn't date in high school. Hence the pashing spree that is this season. The cheeky make-out with Abbie on the bed, which made us feel like we were watching two teenagers breaking into the parents' room at a house party. The repeated ignoring of GIANT RED FLAGS about Abbie's behaviour from women who seem to legitimately care about his happiness.

And that time he pulled her in for a spot of tonsil hockey in front of two very awkward masseuses.

Obviously Abbie appeals to his more base, masculine instincts. But when she says things like, "I like you driving big vehicles," or "my nipples are falling out of my bikini top," he giggles like a child.

It's become...hard to watch.

As the season had progressed, the general sentiment towards Matt seems to have changed.

At the hometown dates, it was refreshing to see the families drill Matt about what he was bringing to the table.

If Matt's going to survive this season sans backlash, he might need to start showing us.

How are you feeling about our "good guy" Bachelor as the show progresses? 

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Top Comments

Julia 5 years ago

This is exactly why I haven't been watching this season. I've been keeping up with recaps, but the moment he decided to make out with Abbie (and then Helena) at the cocktail party was the moment it was all over for me. I get that what is considered "respectful" behaviour on The Bachelor is wildly different to real life (can you imagine a dude dating 24 women at the same time??), but even this artifical, messed up environment has some unspoken rules, one of which is, don't make out with contestants in a public party setting. Matt just didn't care. And while Abbie was getting the heat for her provocative behaviour, no one was blaming Matt for wanting to get it on like all. the. time.


Cat 5 years ago 1 upvotes

Wait so you entire issue with Matt is that he makes out with Abbie? And that he’s not super keen on gossip from the other girls?

Maybe Abbie is actually quite smart, fun and charming. Channel 10 are giving her a brutal edit but she’s still there, and we see about 1/20 of their interactions. Elly May have cared about Matt but Sogand clearly didn’t, and Abbie has friends in the house, they just don’t get air time talking about her. It’s not like she’s the only attractive girl in the house, many other beauties have gone home so perhaps there’s things about her Matt actually likes other than her attractiveness.

Besides, when did sexual chemistry become a red flag in a relationship?

And yeah he kisses a lot of girls. So what? Are we slut shaming men as well as women now? Cause the whole premise of the show is to date 20 women so IDK what you’re expecting but this is pretty much what I expected.

Anon 5 years ago

Except he was fine with gossip when it was Abbie gossiping about Monique, or Mary gossiping about the one with the large lips...

Personally I think its massively disrespectful for a bachelor to carry on this way with any girl. The reality is he is dating a whole bunch of them, and should be a bit more sensitive to their feelings. I know other bachelors have spoken about how they made an effort to restrain themselves a bit for that reason.

And if he doesn't end up with Abbie, can you imagine being the girl he does end up choosing and having to watch all this/hear about all this when the show airs? Absolutely friggin brutal!

As for Abbie herself, I don't like her. Not because of her supposed sexual confidence, but because she she seems entirely selfish and lacking in empathy for anyone but herself. There is a difference between being assertive and being an asshole. The absolute best thing to come out of the Honey Badger season was the way that the two final girls supported each other in the aftermath. Give me those kinds of girls any day of the week over an Abbie.