From the subsection of people in the universe who have never had to cut open their foundation containers at the end of the month to scrape up the dregs comes leg makeup videos by Kim Kardashian.
Because rich people put makeup on their legs and apparently have some sort of magic solution that guards them against foundation stains that we DEMAND to be clued in on it.
Seriously, what is this witchcraft?
Watch the trailer for Keeping up with the Kardashians season 16 below. Post continues after.
With Kim Kardashian West’s beauty line, KKW Beauty, launching its Body Collection on Friday, Kimmy’s been posting a bunch of oddly mesmerising videos of her coating her legs in foundation and body shimmer.
No seriously – aside from the fact that leg makeup to us, the people who struggle to even keep our legs hairfree, is a wholly foreign concept – this sh*t’s like ASMR.
Behold:
We could watch that brush glide up and down a smooth leg as the tone evens out to perfection for hours.
Days.
Years.
It’s hypnotic.
But as a concept, we have questions. Many, many questions.
The most obvious being why in the world legs need makeup now, which Kim kindly addressed for us in an Instagram post.
“I use this when I want to enhance my skin tone or cover my psoriasis. I bruise easily and have veins and this has been my secret for over a decade,” she revealed.
Noted.
(Our secret is wearing jeans at all time, but anyway).
Remaining questions include but are not limited to:
– How do your clothes not end up covered in foundation?
– Do you have a magical hack for getting foundation stains out of white clothes that we don’t know about?
– Do you use primer beforehand? And what about setting spray? Setting powder? Setting mouse? Setting jam? Help.
– Does the body foundation come with a person to apply it for you while telling you how amazing you are?
– What about sweating? How does… that work?
– Does it cover hair?
We also have a practical suggestion on how to improve the process of covering a body in makeup if you’ve run out of time because you’ve been watching videos of Kim Kardashian covering her body in makeup.
The method, which is similar to a human paint roller, or a schnitzel being coated in egg and breadcrumbs before hitting the fryer, is as follows:
-Fill a bath tub with foundation
-Immediately after showering, affix a shower cap and lower yourself into the pre-prepared bathtub
-Lie flat and roll around in a rotisserie chicken-like fashion until your entire body is covered in foundation
-Stand up and allow the foundation to dry by standing awkwardly in the middle of the bathroom, praying nobody flings open the door to your freshly-coated butt-naked body
-Never put clothes on again unless you want to ruin them for eternity