As I watched the MTV VMAs on Tuesday (recorded live on Monday night, Eastern Time in the US), there was one fact of which I was certain:
These people, while lovely, cannot possibly be famous.
Who are… you:
And... you:
And, relatedly, you:
It made for a confusing event, punctuated by impatient yells of 'wait, who is THAT,' as well as exchanges like:
Me: "Ooooh, does she sing that song that goes Havana, ooh na-na."
Stranger: "No."
I see.
So to give you the goss, without the confusion, here are the 6 things you missed from the 2019 MTV VMAs:
A cringe-y opening monologue
Speaking of people who cannot possibly be famous: Sebastian Maniscalco.
The 'comedian' was, somehow, the person tasked with opening the night, and entered the stage with a cloud of smoke, loud rap music and raucous applause.
For why.
Sir, who are you.
Maniscalco was speaking for approximately 60 seconds before he made a joke about people who get offended and need safe spaces, leading to an immediate Twitter pile on.
Watch Lizzo's viral performance at the VMAs. Post continues after video.
"MTV, what they’re doing is they’ve noticed that we’re living in ultra-sensitive times, right, so if you feel triggered or you feel offended by anything I’m saying up here or anything the musical artists are doing, they’re providing a safe space backstage where you’ll get some stress balls and a blankie," he said.
"Personally, I would remove you from the arena, put you in your car and send you home but they opted with the safe space."
Wrong audience, time, political context, etc etc.
John Travolta not knowing who Taylor Swift was
It was ten years ago that Kanye West yelled "IMMA LET U FINISH" in Taylor Swift's face before literally stealing her microphone as she was accepting her award for Best Video.
This year, when she won the same award, no one stole her microphone. But a man did try to give her trophy to a person who wasn't her.
Watch her whole performance here and WEEP.
Top Comments
When was the US admitted to Eurovision? - I'm so outta' the loop
From all the gushing over Lizzo recently (here and elsewhere) I'm going to call it: she is going to be the new body positive Beyonce.
I love that she always looks like she's having the time of her damn life onstage.