When Married at First Sight contestant Tracey Jewel said that she was moving from Perth to Melbourne to be with her new partner Sean Thomsen (also of the MAFS fame), without her eight-year-old daughter people were concerned.
And by ‘concerns’ we mean Tracey was widely criticised for ‘abandoning’ her daughter in favour of her new boyfriend.
As Tracey wrote for news.com.au, “the level of vitriol against me was shocking.” And she argues, unfairly so.
The 35 year-old business woman and speaker gave us a bit of background into their family dynamics.
When Tracey and her ex-husband separated when their daughter was three-years-old, her ex-husband remarried to a woman who also had children of her own.
Eventually they realised that, “taking her away from her siblings was causing her more stress, and she was missing out on family activities that they got to experience.” As well as that, Tracey returned to work, and the family collectively their daughter would live with her father’s family.
“It made no sense for [my daughter] to be in daycare when she could be with her siblings and step-mum,” said Tracey.
“It works with our family.
“She’s now been with this family unit longer than when we were married.
“I see her at least one night a week and more in school holidays, and she’s a happy, well-adjusted girl, and that’s all that matters.”
In a similar situation? When Chloe Shorten, that’s Bill Shorten’s wife, separated from her husband of ten years, with two kids in the mix, she learnt a thing or two about blending families, navigating custody, and breaking divorce to the kids. Post continues after audio.
And despite living on the other side of the Australian coast, we can be all relieved to hear that Tracey did factor in the co-parenting situation with her daughter’s father, which happens to be something she’s been doing for the past five years.
“I’ll fly to Perth on lots of weekends and of course she’ll fly over to Melbourne in the school holidays,” wrote Tracey.
“We’ll get an apartment with at least two bedrooms, so she’ll will have her own room there.
“And there’s no way I’ll spend any more than a month without seeing her.”
Instead Tracey compared her situation to that of fellow MAFS’ contestant Telv while he was filming, highlighting the double standard.
You see when Telv moved to Melbourne, despite the fact his children lived in Perth, you might have noticed the lack of ‘father shaming’ that happened.
As Tracey writes, “nobody is out there calling him a bad parent. It shouldn’t be any different for me.”
And we’re inclined to agree.
Did she owe us an explanation? No. Did we deserve one? Not really.
And now can we all move on and calm down, now that we can confirm that she will continue to see her daughter after her move to Melbourne, as if that wasn’t the case before?
Please let’s.
Top Comments
I don't agree at all. When Telv moved I was just as frustrated as I am hearing that Tracey is also leaving a child behind. I don't care whether it's a mother or a father who leaves, it still gives the child the impression that something in that parent's life is more important than being close to them. I'm not suggesting the parent the child stays with isn't providing a wonderful home with lots of love and that the child isn't cared for, far from it. But bringing a child into the world then choosing not to physically be there for them is selfish, and damages that child's sense of self-worth. A new relationship is never more important than your child. Ever.
Nope,this doesn't sit well with me. I have two daughters and the thought of only seeing them one night a week and school holiday's is unfathomable to me, I couldn't cope. Even if I split from their dad I would still have to see regularly. It's the same with them, there is no way they could cope. Each to their own but this is not great
Yes, but just because you feel this way, doesn't mean everyone else should and those who are different are not wrong...just different! As you say, each to their own but sans judgement.
In my opinion, this set up sounds ideal for single woman with outside goals and interests. And for me personally, If I knew my kids were well cared for and happy, I'd definitely be able to spend time apart from them.
Um.. that's right, that is why it's my opinion, I never said EVERYONE has to feel this way or that everyone who doesn't agree with me is wrong.
I'm all for them having sleepovers at the grandparent's every now and again but not living in different states and only seeing them every 10 weeks
That's nice to know that you are happy without them with you, but me as a mother I just couldn't. I guess I just love them too much 😏