fashion

A woman found the "perfect" dress for a funeral, but her husband says it's "too much".

While dress codes are generally on the decline, there are some occasions where rules still apply about what we can wear.  There are certain expectations about how we’ll dress for work, for weddings, and, sadly, for funerals.

And perhaps it’s this last place that attendees are having the most trouble with, given how infrequently we go. Is black still the only colour allowed? How conservative does it need to be? Can I show my bare legs?

A woman facing this dilemma posted a photo of the dress she planned to wear to an upcoming funeral on parenting forum Mumsnet, hoping for some clarification. But commenters were divided on whether her dress was “appropriate” for a funeral or not.

The woman said she thought the dress was “perfect”, but her husband disagreed.

"I already have this dress and have a funeral next week. I intend to wear it with black tights and black ankle boots with a small heel.

"Also I am five foot tall so it is practically knee length on me.

"I thought it was perfect but my husband seems to think it's 'too much'."

She later clarified that the dress fits well and doesn't gape, and she's even considering wearing a scarf with it.

"Also it's certainly not what I would wear of a night out but I am a fairly formal dresser, I wear similar dresses on weekends."

Many users succinctly told her that the ruffled wrap Vero Moda dress from ASOS was "totally fine".

However, some backed up her husband's point of view that the choice was "too dressy".

"Hmm, I don't really think it's suitable funeral attire either. It's the sort of style I'd wear on a night out," one commented.

"It’s a bit frilly for a funeral for me. I’d wear something plainer," another said.

Another user thought the dress could work... with just a few minor adjustments.

"Do you have a pair of black jeans or trousers you could wear underneath? That would be more suitable than tights. Also, could you wear a vest or crew neck T-shirt underneath? If not then perhaps a broach at the top of the neckline to close it?"

But far more users disagreed, with one pointing out, "You're going to a funeral, not a nunnery".

Others told her that black wasn't really expected at funerals anymore and it was doubtful the family would take enough notice to care if the dress was a bit frilly.

Despite the mixed reviews, the woman said the positive comments had reassured her.

"Thank you, everyone. I feel a lot better, I haven't been to a funeral before so was unsure.

"Also, I promise not to pout or wear jeans underneath."

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Top Comments

Elaine Searle 5 years ago

For goodness sakes, it’s perfectly fine. The bottom line for how to
Dress for a funeral is, “is your outfit respectful?”.


fightofyourlife 5 years ago

I'm far more horrified by the suggestion to wear jeans to a funeral than I am by this dress. The dress is absolutely fine. Jeans are never appropriate funeral attire and I hate the idea of wearing them under a dress in any circumstances.

I would wear tights if I really felt the dress was too short (although if the OP is 5'0", I can guarantee it's definitely not too short - ASOS's models are usually at least 5'6") but I wouldn't make any other adjustments.