^ That’s the strange and indecipherable sound we’re all making on this dreary hump day.
Wednesdays are just the worst, aren’t they? Ugh. UGH.
Before you lose the plot and throw your iPhone out a window (don’t do that, it’s far too expensive) why don’t you read some sweet sugary celebrity gossip?
It’s better than therapy. We promise. (For legal reasons we should probably say that we’re kidding… so, erm, we’re joking, guys. Don’t stop seeing your psychologist because you read our Celeb in 5 posts every day, please…)
1. Disgraced Christian Josh Duggar has welcomed his first child since his Ashley Madison “personal crisis”.
The oldest (and douchiest, but that's not the point) member of the Duggar family has welcomed his fifth child with wife Anna; the first the couple have had since his penchant for adultery was realised.
(For those who missed the memo, Josh was busted on Ashley Madison. Oh, and in 2015, he also cheated on his heavily pregnant wife. He's also been accused of allegedly molesting five girls between the ages of 14 and 15. So, you know, stand up guy etc etc.)
After some six months in a Christian-based rehab, where he recovered from his "secret addiction" to pornography, old mate Josh was prepared to join the family again.
Now? Little son Mason Garrett has joined the world.
“He arrived today without complication and we already adore him," the duo wrote in a blog post. "The entire family is ecstatic over the arrival of another beautiful blessing."
Mason joins the little crew of Mackynzie, Michael, Marcus, and Meredith.
2. Britney Spears spends AU$158,000 on massages every year. And then there's her wardrobe...
Remember the Brittany Spears meltdown of 2007? We're guessing she does too, because 10 years on, she's still paying for it.
The singer remains under a conservatorship order, which means everything she spends is monitered through a 'responsible party' and available for public retrieval.
TMZ went ahead on our behalf and obtained the docs detailing what Britney spent in the past year, and it turns out, she's just like us. Big ticket items included the essentials like groceries, haircuts, make up and even Target purchases - she's so real.
Oh, except she's a millionaire who managed to drop AU$158,000 on massages and manicures in the last 12 months alone.
Britney also forked out a cool $86,701 on her wardrobe and $30,355 for her makeup. Oh, and her dogs? They were pampered with $37,150 worth of goodies.
3. Olympic gold medallist Leisel Jones announces her engagement.
A massive congrats is in order for former Olympic star Leisel Jones, who announced her engagement on Instagram on Tuesday night.
While she's been keeping herself busy post-swimming career with a memoir, a line of active-wear, and a short stint on Channel 10 reality series I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here, Leisel also found time to maintain a functioning relationship with her now-fiancé, Damon Martin.
"Damo popped the question while we were in The States. I can't wait to annoy the hell out of you for the rest of our eternal lives. Love you," the three-time gold medallist captioned the image of the loved-up pair.
4. Gday, nostalgia. Here's Cindy Crawford's 16-year-old daughter nailing her first runway show.
Like mother, like daughter right?
Cindy Crawford owned the runway for decades and now her daughter appears to be doing just the same.
Sixteen-year-old Kaia Gerber made her debut at New York Fashion Week, opening for the Alexander Wang show - which is no small feat considering the designer is one of fashion's biggest names.
In true Cindy Crawford fashion, she nailed the walk and even managed to make satin tracksuit pants look good.
5. Lady Gaga announces she suffers from chronic illness fibromyalgia.
Lady Gaga has spoken about a chronic illness she has been dealing with for years, days after her Netflix documentary Gaga: Five Foot Two made its debut. Now, she's reaching out to anyone else battling the invisible illness.
Fibromyalgia is a musculoskeletal illness that inexplicably causes chronic pain across the body. It can also impact energy, sleep and mood. As Gaga took to Instagram to share an image of herself completing treatment for the pain, she also recommended other ways she has dealt with it in the past.
The singer referenced her pain back in 2016 on Instagram saying: "Having a frustrating day with chronic pain, but I find myself feeling so blessed to have such strong intelligent female doctors."
This is the first time Lady Gaga has named the illness she suffers from.
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