BY MESHEL LAURIE
Of course that British lady, Samantha Brick, who thinks that her “beauty” is the reason women don’t like her is a bit odd (you can read more about her here). She has problems and I genuinely feel sorry for her. The publicising of her malfunction is annoying because it perpetuates a myth that I’ve had flung in my face many times by men, which is that woman hate beautiful women.
I have been a woman for almost forty years. I attended an all girl high school, which was quite a bootcamp for bitchiness believe me! I’ve worked as a receptionist in brothels, where looks equate to income almost as transparently as they do in the television industry in which I dabble now. I currently have friends who are among the most celebrated beauties in the country, and I can honestly say that I have never known of a woman being disliked because she is beautiful. I’ve known a few who were disliked because they’re up themselves, but ugly people are just as good at that.
The prettiest girl in our school was Claire. She had long, silky blonde hair and a complexion like warm milk. She was also so very sweet natured, quick with a shoulder to cry on, tight with a secret, and didn’t take herself or her looks too seriously although she was well aware they were there. “You should enter the Dolly Cover Girl competition,” we used to say her, as we were convinced that no one in the world was as pretty as Claire. She would blush and wave us away. She was as smart as she was kind – what I would refer to today as an inspirational woman.
The most beautiful prostitute I ever knew was Tori. She was an exotic 6ft tall, olive skinned stunner, almost a bit Beyonce in those ads where they make her look thinner and whiter. She wore boots like Julia Roberts’ in Pretty Woman and she was transsexual which was not a secret from clients, but her greatest selling point. She was mostly loved by the other girls because she was very sweet, even though she was completely aware that she was by far the most precious gem in our shop. Those who disliked her did so not because of her beauty, but because of the clients they lost to her, and because she was very lazy about cleaning up after herself and yes, that was as gross as it sounds. Everyone was very sad for her though, when her excitement at saving enough money for a trip to Bali turned to sadness and humiliation because she was forced to accept a passport that said “M” for “male”. She dreaded all the times she’d have to show it to people and what their reactions would be. Even the jealous old shaggers took pity on Tori that day despite the fact that she was beautiful, she was going to Bali and she’d left a pile of terrifying towels in the hallway the night before.
Beautiful women in Australian television are completely commonplace of course. Spend enough time around a TV network and you’ll stop marvelling at their teeny tiny designer dresses, voluminous manes of hair and symmetrical, angular faces. You’ll find women like Kerri Ann Kennerly who’s beauty is undeniable but who has appealed to generations of Australian women because of her warmth and wit. Lisa Wilkinson, who’s charm and generosity endear her to millions of strangers. Carrie Bickmore, who’s angelic looks belie an emotional stamina that seems to know no bounds.
Women do not hate beauty in other women. We actually like to gaze upon it as much as men do, otherwise there would be no magazine/fashion/beauty industries. I don’t think anyone is keen on delusions of grandeur though which could be the real reason behind Ms Brick’s lack of dinner party invitations.
Some of the most beautiful women show their true beauty from inside and out. With no delusions of grandeur
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Meshel Laurie is a comedian and broadcaster. You can catch up with her on Nova’s Drive Show with Tim Blackwell and Marty Sheargold 4-6pm on weekdays. You can also follow Meshel on Twitter here.
Top Comments
What she's saying isn't completely unheard of. There are studies that back her up: http://www.guyspointofview....
As for her article, yeah she did come off as a bit arrogant but that is probably to cover up her own insecurities. People often brag about things to bolster their own self confidence. I'm no stranger to that; I know I sometimes say things I ought to keep to myself just to reassure myself. You can see that she is doing the same thing by listing all the men who have given her free things, etc. Her bragging is a form of self-reassurance. She was probably rejected as some point in her life (probably the fact that she had a lazy eye and was chubby younger caused some insecurity, I can relate because I had both as well when I was younger), and to cover up that wound she has to repeat why she's better not so much to make other people believe it as it is to convince herself that it is true. That is my honest speculation anyway; speaking as somebody who finds myself making the same mistake often. But the way that people react to her is equally revealing: does that not also point out a lot of insecurity on the behalf of the offended people who take her article so personally and feel the need to publicly bash her and put down her looks?
She probably really is pretty in real life; some people just aren't photogenic. But I don't see how bashing her is a good idea, it only proves her point, no? It certainly doesn't help anything.
Besides, people like Jen Davis sharing their experiences of being judged based on their looks are basically doing the same thing; but they are being applauded for it, not ridiculed. I do think that there is a problem; as indicated by these studies, with people judging other people simply based on their looks, both for being pretty or for being ugly. There's other articles out there that prove the same thing. Either way, it's wrong.
I wrote an article related to this a little while ago trying to explore the different aspects of the skinny vs. overweight ordeal:
Definition of Beauty: A Defense and Reprimand of the Fashion Industry and Those Who Criticize It-Regarding the Problems of Obesity, Anorexia, and Self Respect
mtgrl.wordpress.com
Ashley Judd said it beautifully today: "Patriarchy is a system in which both women and men participate... It is subtle, insidious, and never more dangerous than when women passionately deny that they themselves are engaging in it. This abnormal obsession with women’s faces and bodies has become so normal that we (I include myself at times—I absolutely fall for it still) have internalized patriarchy almost seamlessly. We are unable at times to identify ourselves as our own denigrating abusers, or as abusing other girls and women."
Lets not support denial. That road does women no good at all.
http://www.thedailybeast.co...
perfectly said.