The Magnum stick was licked clean. I’d slobbered on it for a good 10 minutes before I’d realised it was a winner, entitling my worthy self to one entire free Magnum ice cream. All I had to do was hand my slobber stick over (which was also my prize) to the next shop cashier I saw.
Ewww. No thank you.
We all have a frugality line. We’ll bend over backwards to skimp on one thing if it means we can splurge somewhere else. I used a box as a bedside table for years because I’d sooner spend my money on entertainment which is my super secret codeword for ‘wine’. But you’ll be damned if you catch me using a coupon or a bus, even though I’ve never really been in a position to be so choosy.
Mum was a coupon whisperer. Able to wrangle all the coupons from all the dusty nooks of the home with the military precision required to spend them in the right places, at the right moments for maximum effect. It was a science, she claimed, and I often imagined her combing through the junk mail in a lab coat like an eccentric genius.
Her savings! It’s aliiiiiiive!
And wow, they saved her a lot of money. I’m surprised she never made it on to A Current Affair, selling the secrets of the coupon whisperers like a spurned magician dibdobbing on an entire industry.
“Please don’t make me go to Costco. I don’t want a bargain. Not that much. The idea of buying 180 rolls of toilet paper to save $4.50 is too awful to contemplate.
And isn’t it better, frankly, to be ripped off by Coles or Woolworths than to be subjected to the retail waterboarding that is a big-box discount store?
The rising cost of living is hurting all, so many families are spending much of this precious weekend in the slow chug to Auburn to check out Costco’s bargain bonanza.
If you wanted to queue up for three hours, pay a membership fee, scramble across a concrete floor in search of gratification, and then face the nightmare of getting the hell home, why not just go out for a drink in Kings Cross?”
That’s to say nothing of those for whom Costco might be a wise investment. Or those who need to because belts are, as they say, tight. The point is that all of us, in one way or another, prioritise our spending.
My own family might have wallpapered coupons and dockets across town like they were fiscally responsible confetti, but it was so we didn’t have to skimp on other things. Like contact for our school book covers. You get what you pay for, Mum told me, and if we tried to haggle on contact prices we’d all end up with books that looked like the hide of a forlorn elephant.
She was right.
As for me? I’d sooner attend an opera performed only by sheep that lasts several days than be caught using a coupon. But then I recently lived without home Internet for 18 months. Go figure.
What will (and won’t) you do to bag a bargain?
Top Comments
I have been to the stores in the US and everything from the car park to the actual shopping area in the store is bigger and well orgnaised. It took us 20 mins to park, 30 mins to get the card (which could have been avoided if you order online). Once at the top level, there were no trolleys so i had to brave the crowd and go back down. Inside the experience was even worse, there were thousands of people and you could barely push your trolley around. The checkout counter had 100 people in line to pay!!!! Claustrophobia struck and guess what... you cannot even find the exit correctly because there were so many people waiting in line! I promptly cancelled my membership card as i have better things to do than to wait in ridiculous lines. I am not sure what has gone wrong with the design and location of this store. Or maybe people in Sydney are flocking to Costco as Harvey Norman, Coles and wollies have been over charging us for years. If they fix the space issue, it will be awesome...
The lines are crazy at the moment because everyone is wanting to 'try' it out or have been to a costco overseas and reliving their experience. But I went in the evening as it doens't close until 8:30pm and had no problems with crowds. In a month or two the crowds won't be as bad because people will realise that you don't have to shop at Costco everyweek like you do at the other supermarkets. I plant to shop monthly because the size of my purchases mean that a monthly shope is all that I will need.
Single - income - 3 - kids
You soon get over your pride when you have to balance a budget and provide well for your family.
Although buying in bulk will be a waste of time with the carbon tax because I wont be able to afford the electricity to bulk buy meat.