BY CARLY FINDLAY
Carly has a lifelong genetic chronic illness called ichthyosis form erythroderma (which means scaly red skin). Her skin gets itchy and sore and she gets infections easily, which sometimes result in hospital stays where she is bandaged up like a mummy. You can read more about her story here.
There used to be colours I’d avoid wearing close to my neck. Black, bottle green and navy. They showed up my peeling skin – epidermal snowflakes on dark wool and cotton.
I couldn’t avoid bottle green and navy – they were my uniform colours at primary school and high school. I had snowflakes on my shoulders. Those anti-dandruff shampoo ads do nothing for the self esteem, screaming “OMG skin flakes on shoulders – avoid me at all costs!”
I used to cover up, and be encouraged to cover up. Mostly because my skin made me feel embarrassed, and I didn’t want people staring at more than just my face. People assumed the worst – that I’d been “stupid in the sun” or in a fire. Plus I was conscious of getting skin everywhere.
Now I still cover up, but not as much – only because it’s more comfortable to, rather than being cold and enduring the scrapes and knocks encountered in daily living.
I wear little dresses layered over stockings and long-sleeved tshirts.
And I always carry a jacket.
I want to show off the favourite features of my body and I also want to show that people with visible differences can celebrate their appearance.
I think body diversity and positive body image is so much more than size and shape. It’s about ability, disability, scars and colour too. We need to celebrate visible differences in all forms.
Just as we need to show women of all sizes in the media to reflect our population, we also need to normalise difference. It’s ok for people with visible differences to be proud of our appearances.
Years ago I wouldn’t have dreamed of wearing these dresses – especially not the strapless one. But they make me feel fabulous. And they make others notice what I am proud of.
Carly Findlay is a 20 something Melbourne woman working full time as an events planner/writer and a freelance writer on the side. You can follow her on twitter here or read her blog here.
Top Comments
Carly I wanted to ask your opinion on something. My boyfriend about a year ago now developed a condition called alopecia universalis. Essentially all of the hair on his entire body fell out in the space of a month. He was 24. It was pretty traumatic for both of us at the time. No eyelashes, nose hair, ear hair nada.
Now its been a year, I am pretty much used to it, however what I am not used to, or appreciate is people coming up to me or him and asking if he has cancer. When I explain it sets off a conversation which I've had soo many times. So lately I have been pushing for him to get some fake eyebrows in order to create the impression that his hairloss is unfortunate genetics rather then a death sentence. To me I nag him about a lot of things - which he has acknowledged in the past has done him good. eg I nag him to call his soccer mates and arrange drinks. He is probably 50/50 about the idea. I have mentioned it more then a few times. I am not sure if he is just humoring me and wish I would shut up.
So I'd love to know what you think. We have been together a very long time, and feel comfortable talking about tonnes of things, but is it wrong of me to be pushing for a very cosmetic change? I was once in a position where I had a boyfriend who said very nasty things about my body and I didn't like it. I am trying to convince myself that this is a little different, but am open to someone calling bullshit on me.
I'm not sure if you are the same woman I used to see around Albury a few years ago? I noticed a young woman very similar in appearance and was instantly struck by a radiant smile and a person who seemed to have such confidence and zest for life. You are amazing and an excellent role model for all young women. I'll be sharing this article with my teenage daughters. Thank you!
Thanks so much - im from Albury! Haven't lived there for 10 years now, though.