by KATE HUNTER
So, poor TV star Elizabeth Banks has caused a bit of a…. well, a drama, by telling People magazine that you’re not a “real mom” until you have more than one child.
The 38 year old actress (she was hilarious in What To Expect When You’re Expecting) said it in a joking way – having recently had her second child and commenting about how much harder it is with two boys under two as opposed to just one.
Here’s how she put it:
“When you have one kid, you feel like you can jet set around and you can throw him on the hip and you get your life done.
You don’t realise how easy one is until you have two. Now I’m really a mom. Oh, I am a mom now! That’s new! This is for serious — I am responsible for two people now….”
Gosh, she’s a brave woman, that Elizabeth. I mean, as a non-famous person who got slammed online for saying I’m a bit lukewarm about my dog, you can only imagine what she’s copping from irate parents with only one child.
Still, it’s not the first time I’ve heard that opinion voiced.
A ‘friend’ once said to my sister in law (who had one baby and was desperately keen for another), ‘One child is an accessory, but two makes a family.’ Yes, seriously, she said that. Out loud. Not in People – in a bookshop cafe, but same same.
It would have been funny if it wasn’t hurtful. Actually, even then it wasn’t funny. And it’s not true.
I met up this morning with an old pal. She is one of TWELVE. I asked her what she thought of Elizabeth Banks’ comments.
‘What a load of rubbish,’ she said. I love this girl, by the way.
‘Logistically, more kids is trickier, getting them into the car and stuff … ,’ she mused, ‘And you might be less stressed about ear infections, but that’s about it.’
Then we went onto discuss the chaos that reigns in many homes we know – our own included (she has four, I have three), and decided there was no evidence whatsoever to conclude that parents of more than one kid are in any way superior to the parents of an only.
Sure, as kids grow up, bigger families might have a greater frame of reference – if you have a bunch of kids, there’s more chance one of them will do something awesome or something terrible, so you might have greater experience of those things but that’s no guarantee of handling them well.
The Waltons and The Brady Bunch and The Partridge Family were all made up. Michael Jackson’s family is real. Know what I’m saying?
Do you believe it takes more than one kid to get your parenting stripes?
Top Comments
I am an "only child" and have the 1 child by choice. Seriously, my life has changed so much since having my son 5 years ago, its like night and day. It can be intense with just the one - you are their everything and you are also more stressed as you are forever learning how to parent and can't compare your child with other kids of your own. There may be less cooking, washing, cleaning and ferrying about (which is great can I add!) but there is other stuff.
I know this a really old post, but going to throw a comment in anyway... my second pregnancy resulted in a gorgeous baby girl,. I didn't tell my Mum about my 3rd, which was not going well from the beginning, in spite of good blood results. When I did tell my Mum of my admission to hospital to 'remove a blighted ovum' ( technical term for a special kind of heartbreak you can watch on a monitor for 6 weeks) she insisted on coming to help post surgery. After fussing over my special colour of yellow, she hugged me and told me it was so sad I wasn't meant to have a real family. I know she meant no harm, but on behalf of my man of more than 20 years years and my then 4 year old, I feel I have a real family. Not as big as I would have liked, but very real and very precious. The statement nearly dropped me to my knees and hurts today.