lifestyle

Ian Thorpe, in his own words.

 

 

 

 

Ian Thorpe’s astoundingly candid interview with Michael Parkinson has just aired on Channel Ten.

The 32-year-old Olympian champion covered everything from his love of water to his aspirations as a TV presenter.

But of course, the most important revelation – for him and for us – was that yes, Ian Thorpe is gay. After many, many years of speculation, he is finally comfortable enough to come out to a nation he has made so very proud.

Here’s everything Ian Thorpe wants you to know — about depression, sexuality, success, and survival. Whether you saw it live or missed it, Ian Thorpe has just given the most revealing interview of his life.

Share his words with anyone who needs to hear them.

 

1. Why he’s finally ready to come out as gay.

“I’ve wanted to [come out] for some time but I couldn’t, I didn’t feel as though I could. The problem was I was asked at such a young age about my sexuality… and I didn’t know at that age, I was too young, and so the answer was no.

“Then I carried this… I was telling people it was inappropriate to be asking a child such questions, and also it’s not appropriate for that question to be asked of anyone.

“I felt that the lie had become so big that I didn’t want people to question my integrity and a little bit of ego comes into this. I didn’t want people to question well, am I lying about everything?

“I’m comfortable saying I’m a gay man and I don’t want young people to feel the same way I did. You can grow up and be comfortable and you can be gay.”

 

2. His parents were shocked when he told them.

“I was concerned about the reaction from my family, my friends, and I’m pleased to say in telling them, especially my parents, they told me they love me and support me. For young people out there, know that’s usually what the answer is.

“My friends were more like ‘OK, you know, fair enough’, and they said we had some suspicions. I needed my friends first. I told them first.

“Telling my parents and close people, they reflected and they said, it’s not like you’re a different person but a happier person, a person they remember.”

 

3. He’s been asked “Are you gay?” since he was 16 years old. It causes him tremendous pain.

“I had anger about this because I felt I shouldn’t have been asked about it. if I wasn’t asked, I feel as though I would have been much younger when I came out about this. I wouldn’t have lived a very different life but I could have been proud of the fact- yes, I’m out.

“I was already living somewhat of a lie in my life because I was trying to be what I thought was the right athlete by other people’s standards. I wanted to make people proud. I wanted to make my family proud and my nation proud of me.

“Part of me didn’t know if Australia wanted its champion to be gay.”

 

4. He knows his coming out will have a profound effect on young gay people.

“I’m telling not only Australia, I’m telling the world: I am gay.

“I hope this makes it easier for others now.

“I know that people don’t care about this, and I’ve made it a bigger deal than it needed to be and if I had answered this simply it would have been a lot easier on my life. People will critisise me, some won’t like the idea, others may applaud me for it. But it’s me.

“I’ve been so caught up in this, but I am looking forward to being able to get on with my life, to not have any secrets, and know that it’s all out there. I’m a person who doesn’t just go in there and tell everyone everything about myself. I don’t feel comfortable doing that. This is one thing I’m now comfortable with, and it’s out there and we get on with it.

“The only thing is I am a little bit ashamed of is I didn’t come out earlier, that I didn’t have the strength to do it, the courage to break that lie. But everyone goes on their own path to do this, and I don’t want the struggle to be so hard for other people.”

5. He’s been taunted with homophobic insults in public for years.

“You hear things. I heard a lot of homophobic things. I was subjected to homophobic insults as well. People in the street would yell out, call me a faggot, or whatever else. I knew, don’t get in a fight, it’ll end up in the paper, someone will sue… all that rubbish.

“I felt sorry for them that this is how they feel. But still, it’s painful, and I was drawn further and further into the closet because of that. But I also have friends who get implicated because of this. My close friends will now be accused of being my lover.

“It happened in 2009. My housemate who lived with me was drawn into it. I loathe that because I’ve always tried to protect everyone else from what I am doing.

“I didn’t want to be gay but I realised everything I was doing, I was still gay at the end of the day. That was most definitely a part of it, then it was that big lie. I felt there was a weight with that. Also people’s reactions. I was scared.

“Yes, I’d recognise attractive men, but I never really consider hooking up with them because I was scared of people finding out. That’s what i was worried about. I was trying to avoid any emotion, any feeling I had towards good looking men.”

6. He was depressed, suicidal, and self-medicating with alcohol.

Even at the peak of his success.

On what depression felt like every day: “The only reason you’ll get out of bed is to use the bathroom. I’d go through the kitchen because I knew I had to eat…and just find something so I didn’t have to leave the house.”

On contemplating suicide as a young man: “There’s a difference in thinking about suicide and then actually contemplating suicide.”

He admitted to contemplating the method and ways in which he could go about ending his life. Ultimately he said he “couldn’t do it to them [family and friends]”.

“My career was not my own… I needed to get my life back. I thought that the way to do it was to stop swimming…. Yes, I could have won more medals if I had stayed in the pool.”

 

7. He wants a family. And a long term partner.

“I want a family. I love kids and I’d love to have a family. I have a wonderful nephew and a beautiful niece and I’d like my own family. I think I’m a lot closer to that happening now [that I’ve done this interview]”.

 

8. He’ll be able to breathe again once everyone has seen this interview.

“Not yet. I have to wait for this to probably go to air. When everyone sees this, that’s when I can breathe out. That’s when I’ll be happy with this, when people have heard it from me. You know, I look at my life. I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve made good choices with my life, and I think I’ve got back to one of the core values which is most important to me: My honesty and integrity.

“This is one thing that I value more than anything else, and I’ve just offered it to people.”

To Everyone who has sent a message of support I sincerely Thank you!

— Ian Thorpe (@IanThorpe) July 13, 2014

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If this post brings up issues for you, or you just need someone to talk to, please call Lifeline on 131 114. You can also visit the Lifeline website here and the Beyond Blue website here.

 

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Top Comments

Johanna Kidd 10 years ago

Personally, I don't care if Mr Thorpe is gay, straight or otherwise. He seems like a good swimmer, was a good representative for Australia in our swim team&his private life should remain 'private' (unless of corse your sexually interested in him or partnering him). Good on you Ian Thorpe&thank you for everything you've worked so hard for&achieved!


Elle 10 years ago

I loved this interview and found it fascinating. Ian Thorpe seems like a genuinely likable person and he comes across incredibly articulate and intelligent.