We met on the beach today, I was with my friend who mentioned to you that you’re not allowed to have dogs there as it was a conservation zone. You were also asked to park somewhere other than the sand dunes where the turtles have been hatching. Your dad’s reaction highlighted that you all didn’t care very much. After he yelled “I don’t give a f*ck about anyone else but myself” I understood.
When we bumped into you on the beach again I was not prepared for your continued aggression and while I did my best to walk away and not engage, you went there. I have heard it many times but it doesn’t lose its sting.
So I thought I would tell you my story, a story shared by many. Maybe, just maybe you’ll choose how to communicate more effectively in the future. I am hoping that the next person you feel you can’t regulate yourself around there will be a moment that you remember those you’re hurting, those you’re influencing and the world you’re creating.
Growing up I was bullied by those closest to me and then bullied by those in the school yard for six years.
I was called ranga, fatty and porkie amongst other things. 12 years ago I was in the prime of my life. I had started two health and wellness clinics and business was pumping. Then one night I was lured into a situation I couldn’t get out of. I was raped. Now I have dealt with that, but my self-worth is easily triggered.
I found someone that I thought I wanted to spend my life with, but after spending three years with him he asked me way too many times to lose weight. He became frustrated. I did too, I didn't want to be someone else. Even though I held my ground I really lost my confidence in my appearance. I have been single since and scared to date, especially as the last few dates have included passive judgements that I am NOT out of a magazine. Luckily one man was a glimmer of hope, more like a solar flare of hope. Unfortunately life took him in another direction.
On the beach today when you were left with no valid argument and you started attacking our physical appearance in front of your children, parents and husband (who looked very embarrassed), my heart broke. Of course it triggered my own past hurt but to think you're passing that behaviour onto your children, well that was hideous.
So, I ask you to think about the abuse you throw around and if you can't help yourself then don't do it in front of your children. There are so many hurtful people in the world, I beg you to not create more like your father has created you. Children soak up everything around them, they learn how to navigate the world from you. They learn the worth of others through your eyes. They learn what is important in the world by what you place importance on.
You reduced me to my physical "flaws" without knowing anything about me or my life. All I hope for is that you're listening and next time judgemental words are about to come out of your mouth that you catch them... how would you like someone like you verbally attacking your daughter like that? What if your daughter had the same story as me and someone like you did that to her?
Today was the first day all year where I felt pretty good about being in my bathers. Then you happened.
So please be careful with the world your words create...
Katie
P.S. Stay off the sand dunes and keep your dog at home.
Top Comments
Mmm yes its all very well to sit back on your high horse and tell her how she ought to be! However, you judged her and shamed her in front of her family. You tried to make a total stranger accountable to your standards and she lost it! You and your friend did not take a higher moral ground, you chose to verbally repremand her and you got your butt handed to you by a very irated, judged woman who did the same back to you! I hate to inform you, but you are not the social police. YOU don't get to correct people. I hope YOU have been the one to learn something from this!
Hang on a second...
It takes everyone to step up to create a better world.
If someone is doing the wrong thing by parking in the sand dunes where the turtles are hatching and bringing dogs to a conservation beach then what is she supposed to do? Call the cops? They have more important things to do.
What would you rather choose? The life and longevity of a species or someone’s ego?
Are you for real? Like, actually? This lady told a woman a dog couldn't be in a conservation zone, which is true, they were also told they couldn't park their car on the sand dunes because of the recently hatched turtles, also true. I see no judgments or personal attacks there, and if your response to that would be to verbally abuse a person and make gross comments about their physical appearance, especially in front of children, then you're part of the problem in the world. Get a grip.
Ugh you’re the worst. You don’t need to react defensively to criticism. If I’d parked near turtle nests without realising and someone asked me to move, I’d be horrified I’d parked there and move my car. I’d probably feel embarrassed to be confronted but my outward reaction is my choice. And my choice is to think about the right thing to do, and act accordingly.
Your post is either sarcasm, or trolling. One or the other. The OP didn't try to make anyone accountable to 'her' standards, only to the LAW. The OP didn't get personal, the stranger did. This is not about 'social' police, it is about obeying the ACTUAL LAW. I feel sad for you that you think a law-abiding woman who did nothing but point out the LAW deserved to be abused personally on appearance. I guess it takes a bully to defend one.
Exactly.Nobody has the right to treat you like shot.Take some assertiveness and self defense classes they may be good for your confidence