By AMY CHENEY
I found this today in my daughter’s room. My daughter is seven. It was innocently sitting on the floor amongst the Polly Pockets, friendship bracelets and a variety of other crap seven-year-olds love to hoard.
Diyet. Jesus.
Where did she learn the word diet? How does she even know what a freaking diet is?
Whose fault is this? Is it mine because I let her play with Barbies? Because sometimes she’s allowed to watch Total Drama Action? Is it because when I draw with her I can only draw stick figures?
Seventeen Poosh-ups two times a day.
I felt sick. Physically ill. Like someone had knocked the air from my chest.
I could feel myself getting increasingly anxious the more words I was able to interpret from her seven-year-old spelling.
Three Appals, One Per, Two Keewee Froots.
How did this happen?
I am smart about this stuff. I have a degree in early childhood studies. Our family focuses on and promotes healthy eating and healthy bodies. Our attitudes are reasonable and balanced. Weight has never been an issue in our home – it is, for the most part, irrelevant.
I have never stood before my husband and queried ‘does my arse look big in this’. Ever.
Is media to blame for this?
Rid my bike three time a day.
And then I got angry. Really, really angry.
F*ck you society. F*ck you and your and stupid obsession with women and the way they look.
How dare you sneak into my home with your ridiculous standards and embed them in my little girls head, polluting her innocence with your pathetic ideals.
Jog/run up and down the driv way three times.
Your unrealistic expectations will not win in my house.
I am tired of the beauty and body obsessed arena we live in. I am tired of women being portrayed as objects to be saluted and admired or shunned and shamed depending on whether they measure up to societies idealistic standards. I am tired of the conformist attitudes. And then, because I was so tired (and sad, so sad) that I cried.
When Miss Seven arrived home from school I talked to her about her diet note.
Turns out she learned about diets from one of her seven-year-old friends who was on one.
So together we chatted about diets and beautiful healthy bodies and the gift that they are.
I am not naive. I know this will not be the last time I talk about food and weight and bodies with my daughter. I am just ultra pissed that it had to start when she was seven.
Amy Cheney is a sometime writer and mother of three little bitties (who quite literally drove her insane). You can check out more of her work here.
So. Diyets. Diets. Have you ever spoken about dieting or body image with your children? How do you handle that conversation? How old were you when you first became aware of your weight?
200 Comments so far
Hi everyone
This beautifully written post by Amy has clearly struck a chord with so many of you. I want to thank everyone who participated in the discussion but most of all Amy for sharing her experience with the world.
I was absolutely touched by what she wrote and what she wants for her daughter. It scares me that these messages, despite the best parenting there is, still seep through to young girls – especially this early.
It’s up to all of us to push back against those societal pressures and teach little girls that their self worth is about SO much more than just their looks.
Comments will close on this post as of 11.00am today.
Thanks.
Jamila – Editor.
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Hello All, I am Amy’s mother in law and grandmother of the little girl. I would like to tell you all that Amy is a wonderful mother to my 3 of my grandchildren (I have 22 grandchildren and another on the way, I also have 6 adult children) so I think that I am well equipped to comment.
I am very hurt and yes quite disgusted by some of the comments and very uplifted by others. Amy hold your head up high you are a wonderful mother.
I can truthfully tell all of the commentors that my granddaughter is a happy, healthy,acitve, loving child. She reads, (I know this well as we give all our grandies books, and she has loads more than what we give), she also have two robust young brothers, so all her play is not “girly”, she has a wonderful extended family on both sides, to whom she relates wonderfully.
She is ver fortunate that she has the body type and genes that she will probably never suffer weight issues.
I am very proud of Amy for the way that she has handled the issue of the “diet” note with my granddaughter, and I also do not expect there to be any repercusionsabout this, life will continue on with a very happy, supportive family.
Love you Ames
Lorraine xx
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maybe a good opportunity to see if she’d like to do any sports or other physical activity. making this into an issue is doing just that- making it an issue. having a background with eating disorders, I don’t see anything extreme on her list and she is probably just doing it as playing grown up. if parents reacted like this to girls playing dolls (“OH MY GOD SOCIETY WANTS MY BABY TO BE A TEEN MOM” …we’d have problems.
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She has a checklist so that she gets 6 servings of fruits a day and does what amounts to about 20-30 minutes of physical activity a day and there’s something wrong with this? Every girl in America should be doing at least this much to stay healthy. Childhood obesity is a major epidemic and if kids in today’s industrialized lifestyle don’t take an active approach to remaining healthy, they too will be a victim given that most typical activities involve sedentary activities with iPads, phones or TVs.
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I think you are missing the spirit of her comments..
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I don’t understand why so many people think you are overreacting. You are NOT overreacting. This isn’t a list to incorporate more fruits and veggies. This list can easily become all she eats.
I was concerned with dieting since 11. It started out similarly – more healthy foods, more exercise. Then I made myself exercise 2-3 times a day for hours. And eat NOTHING that deviated from my own little plan, self-made rules about “safe foods.”
So yeah, fuck that. Fuck that being any seven-year-old’s mind. I hope to teach my future children that if you focus on nutrient-dense foods (not calories) and maintain an active lifestyle, you don’t need to worry two seconds about dieting.
You’re awesome. Good luck.
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I really don’t see much wrong with this. I did the same thing when I was her age. Maybe even younger. Obviously, you should watch her eating, but the exercise is totally fine. Teach her the importance of eating more than just fruit.
The fact of the matter is, this doesn’t have any goals on it. It’s not like, “omg i haz tuh weigh XX pouns by XX dae.” This seems harmless.
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No, this girl isn’t chasing anything unhealthy. And yes, the technical definition of diet is not ” eating less to lose weight.” And we know that as adults. But this girl’s friend, who is “on a diet”…is she thinking of it as a way to eat better or to lose weight?
I need this kind of check list to maintain my weight. I grew up eating way too much food and not exercising enough. Fat is my default.
But I have friends that, when their clothes start to get a bit snug, slightly reduce what they eat and drink or slightly increase their exercise. They don’t need a sheet like this. Their default is healthy and fit.
This mother has described her (apparently successful) efforts to keep her daughter in the default healthy group…where you move because it feels good to your body and you eat balanced meals only until you are full. Where you don’t need check lists and points systems to lose weight…you just move a little more and eat a little less.
She then expresses her concern that her daughter, instead of playing doctor, house, teacher, fort building or mudpies is playing “diet.” And she’s playing diet because a girl in her class is also playing diet. Imaginative play at this age is kids pretending to be what they some day aspire to be. Who in their right mind thinks it’s a good thing for a seven year old girl to aspire to be a dieter?
Finally, if you actually read the article, you see that the author did use it as a teachable moment…talked to her daughter about what it takes to keep her body healthy. But knowing girls like she does (like everybody who once was a young girl does) she is frustrated that this won’t be the last time and that her seven year old has been introduced to dieting as a rite of passage, a piece of being a woman.
So, no, I don’t think this mother is over reacting. I think this girl is blessed to have a mother who is the right kind of protective.
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Too much Barbies and too much girly stuff? I would say definitely.
I don’t know if you do it, but you should absolutely balance her interests with “boy” stuff. I remember reading a study that said that children raised with toys that were gender-neutral or a mix of female/male toys grew up to be the best balanced kids/adults. Unfortunately I can’t find the link, it was long ago.
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The story states that the mother talked to the daughter and found out that the “diet” idea came from a friend at school who was on one. Maybe I’m naive since I don’t have children, but I would applaud this girl for making healthy food choices and setting goals for activity. With obesity becoming and epidemic in this country, good for her for wanting to make healthy choices and goals. Never did the article say that the daughter’s goal was to lose weight or look better. I don’t see the problem with this scenario,
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“In nutrition, diet is the sum of food consumed by a person or other organism.” (wikipedia)
Healthy eating, exercise, drinking fluids…While I understand your concern for your daughter, I wish more kids were conscious of what they put into their body. Childhood obesity is an epidemic and it looks like you have a little girl who wants to be healthy. To me it looks like your promotion of healthy living is having a positive effect. Reinforce it, take credit for it, and make sure she knows that she is beautiful no matter what.
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Enough people already share my point of view that I won’t write an essay here, but… there’s nothing horrifying in that note to suggest unhealthy habits or emphasis on body image. It’s a list of healthy things to eat and healthy things to do. The word “diet” isn’t a curse, it simply means “what we eat”. A list of the foods you eat is your diet. If you GIVE it the power of the negative interpretation, that’s on you. God forbid your daughter have visions of healthy eating and exercise. What a tragedy.
I can see you interpreting this as a reason to pay attention and make sure a positive healthy attitude around body image is promoted and maintained. But instead you’ve gone too far the other way as what seems to be a knee-jerk reaction; you do not hide that you have your own issues surrounding diet and exercise… I suggest you remember that these are your problems, not hers. Don’t transfer them, or you become a bigger problem than society.
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I can remember at about the age of 7 or 8 I was given a Barbie doll, I think she was in an exercise leotard. In the box came a Barbie exercise cassette tape. Barbie talked me through star jumps, jogging on the spot and skipping among other things. I can still remember at that age how good I felt after doing a workout – I learnt later on that good feeling is from something called endorphins. I was fit and healthy for most of my school life. Once I finished school and started work, things went a bit down hill. I had to do something, so off to the gym I went and found those endorphins again. I am now a full time fitness professional and pilates instructor. I am not super skinny, never was, never will be. But I am fit and healthy and that’s what is important. I instill these qualities in my children. I have 8 year old twin girls, one has drawn up her own exercise and food plan. I am not freaked out. She is training for her basketball team and wants to be the best she can be. I support, encourage and guide both of my children. I help them choose healthy habits, and make sure they understand ‘diet’ isn’t an ugly, terrible word but a life choice – “I eat well, I have a good diet”. Everything in moderation, and if they want that little treat they aren’t to feel bad about it. I have seen the dark side of anorexia and bulimia as it has affected close members of my family. My children and I have discussed this disease. I can only hope I can guide them away from going down that road and that they are not swayed by mean children during their school years. I applaud this little girl in the article for wanting to become fit and eat well. Her ‘diyet’ doesn’t sound too bad to me. But I also applaud the mother for speaking to her daughter about the gift of our bodies. Just make sure you continue to reiterate this to her
Our bodies are a temple, and should be treated as such. Now, I wonder if I still have that Barbie tape…
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There is one horrifying thing here: what she may think of the word “diet”. After all, “diet” refers to what we eat and drink. We have given the word a bad stigma by using it almost exclusively when we are talking about losing weight. A seven year-old shouldn’t know the word in that sense.
I would talk to her about what a healthy diet is. Maybe she doesn’t feel like she eats enough fruits or drinks enough water. I would have the family make a switch together in that case. I would also monitor her behavior to make sure she isn’t becoming obsessive about diet and exercise. Talk to her to see if she’d rather join a soccer club or something else to replace the list of exercises she thinks she needs. Maybe she isn’t getting enough play time. I don’t know.
Now that she knows the word, it may be a good idea to periodically have small family lessons about good food and how eating a balanced diet ensures we are getting the nutrients we need to optimize health. You seem to already be eating healthfully; acknowledge it. I don’t think it’s good to turn “diet” into a taboo word; take control of the word and make it a good thing.
And to other commenters, there are ways to state opinions without tearing someone apart. Get a hold of yourselves! The writer stated that they eat healthy foods. Get off her back. If you’ve ever known and really cared for someone with an eating disorder, you would understand why this word becomes scary when a young child is using it. Chill out!
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This picture really broke my heart, but what makes me feel the worst are the comments below. OH MY GOD PEOPLE, this is a 7-year-old (again: SEVEN YEAR OLD) planning a diet just so she can be skinny, because media has shown her that only skinny people are beautiful and worthy! Come on, it’s not that hard to understand what’s going on here, and instead all these people are just raging about how Amy is a bad mom and should encourage her daughter to keep doing this. I mean, really? Is this what the world has come down to?
Eating healthy for the sake of being healthy and living a longer, better life is completely different from dieting to lose weight and “become beautiful”. I don’t believe this girl understands that eating healthy is good for her. She’s just planning what to eat (if she was a bit older, she problably would be counting calories) in order to be skinny. It’s really, really disturbing.
And people are argumenting that her mom shouldn’t be make a big deal out of this because her list doesn’t include things like “throw up after lunch” and “make boys like me”! Where do you all think anorexia and bulimia come from? They definitely don’t start out of nowhere, but from things like this: a 7-year-old girl telling her school friend that she’s on a diet to lose weight and become pretty. Right there.
I’m worried about our future world if kids are going to be raised under the “go on a diet, be skinny, feel accepted” mantra as soon as they leave the maternity.
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We talk about what is good for our bodies and what makes our bodies work best.
We talk about how doing things like running and excersising helps our bodies to be stronger and work even better.
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I was 6 when I came home from my first day of school and told my Mum I was fat. A girl at school told me I was too fat to play with her.
I’ve hated my body and myself ever since
I’m now 21.
I had anorexia and bulimia when I was 14-15, and from 17 to now I’m still struggling with bulimia.
I hate society. I hate it. My family has been nothing but supportive, every time I pick myself up and get close to recovering a comment like ‘getting a muffin top there!’ or ‘fat people are disgusting’ makes me slip right back down that slope again.
My heart breaks for the friend of your daughter. I was that little girl
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Sounds pretty healthy to me. Eat some fruit everyday, drink lots of water everyday and do a little bit of exercise.. good habits to get into at such a young age. Sounds like shes teaching herself good habits. It’s not like shes writing about throwing up or starving herself or doing something bad. Eating healthy and exercising isn’t just about looking good it’s about being healthy. In ages past people didn’t sit down most of everyday they were moving all the time. Most parents would be happy their kid is so interested in staying healthy. Most kids are writing down a list of all the junk food they want to collect on Halloween or get for their birthday or something.
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I agree. I had the same list drawn up age 7. Why? Because I once had ambitions of being part of the army, and I wanted to be strong and fit. It had nothing to do with how I looked. It was just a bit of fun. At 23, I still am fit, healthy and strong.
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When I was a kid my parents would have doubled my allowance if this was what i planned on doing. I just wanted to sit around and play nintendo all day…
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i THINK you should ask her if she is being picked on at school seems like someone is bullying her and making her feel bad about her body this is so sad im so very sorry , your obviously a great mom you thought this was something you needed to handle you reached out for help your doing the right thing, ignore the ignorance of those who dont realize this . unbelievable , i wish you luck, just encourage her and tell her how beautiful she is and if it is the school MAKE the teachers address it immediately if they dont put her in a new school. public schools are scary!
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I’m shocked at some of the nasty comments below. Questioning her parenting and saying the child shouldn’t have Barbies (basically insinuating the parent is at fault via this) or be reversing her letters. (Teacher of 10 years here assuring you they do it often.) I do wonder if the people with the cranks have children themselves?
It’s sad when people are always tearing others down.
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But I do think we can reclaim the language, at least. We can talk to our kids about how “diet” means how we feed ourselves on a regular basis. We can talk to them about their bodies and what it takes to keep a body healthy, no matter the shape or size. And yes, we may need to be more intentional about videos and playthings and the cultural messages they carry. But it’s not your fault. I think you are exactly right to open up dialogue. Maybe you could also have a play date with some of her classmates and figure out a way to introduce some alternative messages there.
http://Www.redefinelabelleza.blogspot.com
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It was a list about being active and eating healthy foods. No reason to be alarmed, the word diet bummed you out… I get it but I think no need to discourage or be upset that she wants to do all the things on there. They are all great goals…just make sure the end goal is having fun and being active and thankful for her mobility, not trying to be thin or fufifll a beauty idea
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I’m annoyed at the recent trend online to consider it “sad” or to “blame the media” for young women’s interest in healthy eating and exercise. The girl’s list wasn’t “Throw away my bag lunch”, “Puke up dinner”, “Make the boys like me”… it was perfectly healthy suggestions. While the title “diet” isn’t great (a word she most likely doesn’t even understand), and the routine should me monitored to ensure it’s managed healthily, I see no reason to be upset by her interest whatsoever. Eating disorders are an issue, eating right and exercising is not. Encourage the girl, don’t lecture her.
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While I disagree with it being called a ‘diet’, as there’s healthy activities included on the list, I don’t see a major problem here. It lists good food and healthy activities. a girl doing push up will gain mass, not shrink. Don’t see the problem with fruits. Now, if it was called a list for healthy living, maybe that would be better.
Also, it is only people that are worried about weight that connsider the word diet as an activity that is done to lose weight. What we eat on a regular basis is our diet, specifically dietary intake. The principle definition of the word diet in all dictionaries is in essence the types and amounts of foods you eat. It only became “in an effort to improve health” later. So take a deep breath. Odds are, the teacher or whomever used the technical terminology for diet and is not trying to make your daughter a barbie supermodel. If they were, they’d definately leave out the push ups as that also lowers upper body fatty tissues.
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We don’t discuss “diets”, “perfect body image”, or the need to be skinny. We do discuss how to be healthy, what are healthy activities and foods to keep our bodies healthy and strong. But, at the same time we enjoy not so healthy snacks every now and then. Who doesn’t love cookies, chips, ect…?
We try to be reasonable and it’s working so far.
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Reading the kid’s note suggests to me that she has been learning about healthy eating and exercise in her classroom at school
diet isn’t a dirty word. The definition of diet is: food, as seen in terms of its types, qualities and effects on health.
Every one should be talking about diet with their children.
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At 10 years old, around the time of Mary-Kate Olsens stint with anorexia, I decided the best way to loose weight would be to just stop eating for a few days, until I felt I was at an ‘ideal’ weight and then my life would be good again. Looking back I can’t believe I actually thought this!!! It just shows how undereducated I was that anorexia could be a simple short term solution to chubby-ness rather than a serious eating disorder. I don’t know what necessarily brought this on, but I believe it was far more than some advertisements of Miranda Kerr in a bikini. I continued to battle with weight issues well into highschool and now, in uni, I still am very weight conscious but have channelled it into a healthy eating and excercise routine which is a good thing
I believe I would have felt more comfortable if my mum had gone along side me saying something like “well, we are healthy already by doing this and this” rather than try and brush it off saying that “you’re beautiful no matter what” nonsense… kid’s arne’t unaware of how meaningless that can be coming from your mum… But that’s just my personal opinion coming from my own experience, not trying to tell you how to raise your kid or anything, but as a kid, I have been there.
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My heart just broke. My bubba is 6 and I am trying so hard to shield her from all the crap the world throws our way. It’s great y were able to turn it into a teaching moment – you are both in my prayers.
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To all of those who have offered kind words and advice it is much appreciated. To those who chose to focus on the composition of the note I certainly offer you no apologies for Miss Seven’s spelling. I am afraid that many have completely missed the point. To those commenting on Facebook about the authenticity of the note itself; I find your comments to be extremely offensive. I do not have time with three little children to make up ‘fake’ stories as well as write real ones. I am always brutally honest in my writing if nothing else. A x
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my 6 year old writes exactly like this that is how they are taught at school sound it out, how extremely rude and offensive that people would question you like that. I hope your beautiful little girl is ok. Please ignore those comments and look after your self xx
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Amy there is no need for you to defend yourself or your actions, and I applaud you for your honesty and your concern. This just highlights what has been going on for generations and I wish it would stop. I remember my now older daughter telling me at 8 that she was not going to eat butter anymore. When asked why she stated it was fattening, like you we then had a conversation about healthy eating etc, but I to was alarmed and saddened that such a young child felt the need to concern herself with this. As it turns out this beautiful young lady has had no need to worry as she is active and eats reasonably well, but without the watchful eye of a concerned parent who knows where this could have led. You are doing a wonderful job as a parent and derive from a very down to earth, loving and supportive family of your own with equally great siblings and must be a blessing to your parents everyday. Stay strong and keep writing xx
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Amy, I think what your daughter has here is a list of incredibly healthy and smart goals.
I think what has set of an alarm bell is simply the title of the list “diyet”.
If it has been named something different, perhaps you would have felt proud and happy she has been learning the importance of good health.
The obesity rates in children in the country are continuing to rise, I think the importance of healthy eating and exercise needs to be drummed into children earlier.
I don’t remember learning about the food pyramid until I was well into primary school, that could do with the fact I am now classed as an “obese” member of society.
It’s a great opportunity for you to speak to your seven-year-old and reiterate her points and encourage HEALTHY behaviour and “food habits”.
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This behavior is NOT healthy in a child. Over exercising and only eating fruits is not the sort of behavior a seven year old should be performing. It’s obsessive eating/exercise purging like this that leads to eating disorders.
Its good that her daughter is eating this than excessive loads of sugar? Maybe. But if it is obsessive like this, it might lead to something more serious. Having her eat a well rounded diet, more than just fruits and water, is the way to go. And exercising to ENJOY it, not to lose weight is the point at this age. When I was seven, I was riding my bike to have fun, not because I was on a diet.
Shame on you for saying that negative behaviors with food in a Seven year old girl is good. Please know what a well-rounded diet with a good relationship with food is.
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I agree that it looks like a list of healthy goals, but it’s possible that’s she’s taking them to the extreme. Diet-wise, I’d ask her if that’s EVERYTHING she plans to eat. Maybe she’s trying to add fruits, not restrict herself to fruits. But it’s possible that that’s all she plans to eat, and if that’s the case she needs to be talked to about a balanced diet.
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Many years ago I had to place a 7 year old girl into a facility as she had anorexia! Two sad things, she learnt to diet from her friends whose mother’s had issues, and she learnt to be a better anorexic from the teenagers who were with her – sad all around. Always praise your children, no matter what they do! look for the positives and emphasize them
Good luck!
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Wow, that’s a tad harsh, don’t you think? She said promoting healthy eating is part of her family, that doesn’t sound like raising a daughter inappropriately. If anything, it reflects how scary society’s obsession with appearance and dieting has become, when a seven-year-old girl is coming home from school with body and self-esteem issues. To blame her mother for that is flat-out insulting.
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What I find interesting is that the list is about eating fruit and exercising. (At least what I could read.) All about “healthy eating and healthy bodies.” Nothing related to the “obsession with the way women look,” –no suggestion of awareness of “society’s idealistic standards.” No mention of looks at all. That part was read into it by the author. Kids are exposed to a lot of stuff. I would not be alarmed that a child is thinking about fruit, water and exercise.
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For all those people saying lets just embrace this to be healthier. Well actually dieting isn’t about being healthier their is nothing healthy about diets. A healthy lifestyle has more to do with a whole bunch of other stuff besides diets. Dig a little deeper on the issue people.
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amen to dig a little deeper
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I personally think that what you have said is entirely ridiculous. Your diet is probably the single most important factor that you have control over (with activity levels being second) that contributes to how healthy you are.
I’m not talking about fad diets, but a long term commitment to eating healthy balanced food.
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We as Women and Mothers need to question our own beliefs on the pressure and expectation that we, society and media place on women if we endorse our 7 year old daughters to devise a plan to be thinner, prettier, whatever….. A 7 year old hasn’t accumulated enough life experience to have healthy expectations of self image but if fortunate enough, they do have parents who, like Amy, practice healthy eating and lifestyle habits.
I wish our society and attitudes inspired our daughters to devise a plan on how to be smarter, wiser, more resilient and independant women instead of just thinner and I say thinner over healthier because what 7 year old truly knows about healthy lifestyle and food choices!?
There’s a whole future of trials and tribulations for our kids just around the corner so for now, can’t they just be kids and only worry about where they misplaced their favourite toy!?
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I am so against putting pressure on little girls to measure up to any sort of status — kids should be free from fear of being judged for their bodies!
However! A cautionary tale.
When I was a kid I liked sweet food and McDonalds. My dad, at one point early in my life, tried to convince my mom that perhaps I shouldn’t be allowed to eat these kind of foods. She did not agree with putting me on any sort of a diet, nor did she think kids had any business exercising. My sister liked sports and was encouraged to play them because she liked it. I did not like sports and sat on mah butt a lot, and was chunky for a kid. My mom said it was healthy and gave the whole song and dance about puppy fat, but the puppy fat never went away, and now I’m an overweight twenty-something. It’s really hard to lose weight at this point, because now that I’m done with school and working (at a desk), I don’t get to move around a lot during the day. I don’t blame my current physical stature on my mom! I am 100% responsible for whipping my own rear into gear to get in shape. Which I am working on. But it would have been REALLY HELPFUL if I had a childhood where I was encouraged to be healthy and encouraged to make being active a part of every day. Rather than being allowed to sit around and eat fries and chicken nuggets all day because kids are kids.
My point is basically that there’s a balance — make sure you don’t overshoot it.
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Kids are, well no, the world is getting fat, so I dont see a problem.. I think all people should think like this! Starting young is what people need !! Upping the average size is WRONG!! Lets teach are children to be healthy and exercise I say !!!
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I would try to see this as a wonderful opportunity to start a conversation – which you have – so that’s great.
You know, society hasn’t changed all that much; the message is just getting out there differently now. I’m 37 and can remember being in grade 2 (so 7 years old), and we were all weighed in the class, then we had to get in line from lightest to heaviest. I was second most heaviest. I can still remember how that felt. And I felt so sorry for the girl next to me. But I wasn’t overweight at all, I was muscly and have always had muscly legs. It still made me feel like there was something wrong with me. I doubt that kind of thing would happen now, thank goodness, but yes there are still plenty of other ways little kids get shamed about their weight.
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Wow this blows my mind. I don’t have daughters so i never thought children as young as 7 were on diets and thinking like image obsessed teenagers, how scary as a parent.
Just goes to show how the media, institutions like schools and other forms of marketing can infiltrate even our most inncoent members of society.
If we don’t start to challenge this stuff as parents with schools, other parents and the media we will have evry unhappy, unhealthy young women in a bout 10 years or less.
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We already have unhappy, unhealthy people (especially women, but men are also beginning to have more and more body image issues). The majority of the United States is overweight with a large percent being obese. That is unhealthy and they are unhappy with themselves for being that way. We should not encourage gluttony and laziness. We should encourage health and willingness to see problems and fix them! Too far in either direction is bad, but the VAST OVERWHELMING MAJORITY is overweight so do not bring up the small amount of underweight and unhappy people. There is nothing wrong with living a healthy and active lifestyle, stop trying to demonize it and allow people to be overweight and at risk for various health problems and tell them it is fine and to be happy they are destroying their body.
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It’s not that bad. Healthy eating is incorporated in schools, even preschools these days. They are always talking about everyday foods, sometimes foods, treats etc. The fact that she used the word Diet, ok so thats a bit mature for a 7 year old to know about those things, but would you not rather this than her sitting down playing computer games, watching tv, playing on mummy’s ph/ipad and not doing any exercise, eating a packet of chips while she does it??
The thing is, its just a list, is she actually DOING those things? I think if she was you would be aware of it.
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shouldnt we be worried the child can’t write the number ’3′ the correct way at 7? i can forgive the spelling.
Maybe they covered ‘healthy eating’ at school? Maybe that’s how she picked up the word diet?
Lets not get too upset – it’s not “I have to weigh 30kg less in 2 weeks to be cool with the other girls’ or ‘Sarah vomits after dinner so she can loose weight, I should as well’
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Actually anon it’s quite reasonable for children to reverse letters and numbers. Just as we shouldn’t worry about a child exploring the concept of a diet. That is kids work, to make sense of the world they live in & we as parents to guide them through their learning.
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It is common for children of this age to write numbers and letters backwards.
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I’m more worried that adults don’t know the difference between “lose” and “loose”.
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loose and lets…need I say more??
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Glass houses? Stones?
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This list is no reason to become upset about. Now, if it had said something like, “Skip 2 meals a day” or “throw up after dinner”, I’d be upset. But this is just a little girl trying to take care of herself. I was the same way when I was little, and I grew up fine.
I think when she said, “Three Appals, One Per, Two Keewee Froots”, she doesn’t mean she’s JUST going to eat that. She means she wants to incorporate healthier foods into her diet.
Maybe you should enroll her in a sport if she wants to become more active. It’s more fun than running up the driveway 3 times (lol).
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Please don’t let this scare you.
When I was young, I remember I hated the puppy fat on my stomach and made a goal to do 30 sit ups a day. It helped get rid of my belly which I hated, and in turn made me feel better. My sisters and mum did them with me too.
Your daughter is just health conscious and is experimenting. Feel good that her list consisted of exercise goals and healthy eating and not food restrictions! Talk to her and educate her about healthy eating and take control of the situation.
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This is a very difficult situation. What I would say to you Amy is that you know your daughter & it is your job as a mum to guide her through the difficult times she will face while she is growing up. I think you have done a great job of tackling this with her. Continue to be aware of the potential problems, without drawing her attention to your alertness (this is one of the real challenges as kids get older IMO).
Just to address some of the comments here – of course eating fruit & exercising is healthy – it’s the label “Diyet” & the checklist nature of this that are very concerning to me, as a parent of a 19yo daughter (who was 7 once) and as a dietitian.
I have heard (directly from a parent) of a dance school in Sydney which puts their troupe dancers (including girls as young as 6) on a strict diet and they measure body fat % regularly… I’m sure they are not alone. It horrifies me!
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That is the most adorable list I’ve ever seen.
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