RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
In terrifying news for parents, children, teachers, and the population in general, there are some head lice out there that are now resistant to most hair treatments.
Times reported that a recent studied showed of 30 U.S states tested, 25 had lice that were resistant to the main hair treatments.
According to assistant professor in the Biological Sciences and Environmental Sciences Program at Southern Illinois University and study author, Kyong S. Yoon, PhD, ““It’s a really, really serious problem right now in the U.S.”
‘But that’s OK!’, I hear naively you say. ‘In Australia it’s different.’
Oh, you fools.
According to Ninemsn, Dr Deon Canyon of the Office of Public Health Studies at the University of Hawaii has said Australia’s got the same issues.
“The more you use a treatment the less effective it becomes… If you keep on spraying you will breed up the ones that are more resistant. If you kill 98 out of 100 and those two left keep multiplying then the next time you put the product on the kid’s head it might only be 50 percent effective.”
In other words, they’re coming for us.
Obviously the most obvious solution to this problem is to give up on Earth and investigate the one way tickets to Mars.
But as the lice obviously have super powers that could survive in space, we’re not even sure this could work.
Instead, lice expert Katie Shepherd spoke to Allure about less drastic forms of lice removal.
“Parents also need to realise they can’t depend fully on that product. It’s not a miracle drug. It’s more important that they comb and pick through the hair. When you comb and pick, you’re not only getting the bugs out, but you’re getting eggs out and you’re actually stopping the cycle. Because with products, you’re killing the bugs but you’re not getting all the eggs out, and then the whole problem starts all over again.”
Phew, so all we need to do is comb through and pick out the bugs and eggs!
Which is not disgusting in any way. At all.
Apologies for the itchy scalp you’ve inevitably felt upon reading this.